Author’s notes: Well, I’m so happy people are liking this story. I’m having FUN writing it. It’s really a character exercise for me and I’m glad you find it interesting. Heehee…Well, there will be MORE mystery in this chapter. Please bear with me on my presentation of Kaoru. I’m not quite willing to give away her secret yet although I think you will be able to guess after this chapter. Also, this chapter is full of mundane, everyday stuff. BUT it’s a LOOONG chapter, so enjoy! (hopefully…)

Disclaimer: I’m just a poor person with an active imagination. The characters weren’t mine to begin with – I just borrowed them.

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Chapter 4: images of insanity

Pain, confusion and sadness.

I feel them all.

Nightmares haunt me.

Blood coats me and covers my mind with its stain.

Kenshin leapt from his seat at the sound of the blood-curdling scream, his mind racing and his hand reaching for his hip, where his sword usually hung. Finding no hilt to grasp and discovering himself wrapped loosely in a sleeping robe, Kenshin relaxed from his fighting stance.

The apartment was still pitch black and Kenshin deduced that it must be three or four o’clock in the morning. He looked around, wondering if the scream had just been part of his dream.

But then another scream erupted, splintering the silence.

This time, it was clear who was screaming. Kenshin walked over to his closed bedroom door and placed his ear to the frame. Listening closely, he heard erratic breathing.

Had she hurt herself?

Or was she, like him, plagued by nightmares?

Kenshin heard a sudden creak in the mattress, signalling that she had probably sat up quickly from the bed. He concluded that the girl had screamed in her sleep. Another loud creak. She had left the bed. Kenshin wondered what the girl could possibly be up to.

Then he heard it. The soft sniffles and choking breaths. The girl was crying.

Crying meant that she was breathing.

Breathing meant that she was alive.

Alive meant that he really didn’t have to open the door to investigate.

Just as he turned away from the door, a choked wail reached his sensitive ears. Kenshin sighed, his shoulders sagging in resignation. He sank to the floor and sat, cross-legged with his back to the door. Letting his scarlet hair fall forward over his shoulders, he bowed his head slightly and closed his eyes. Rationalizing that his position near the door would allow him to make sure the girl didn’t hurt herself, he prepared to stay. He wouldn’t be able to sleep anyway, with all her sniffling and choking.

Kenshin snorted to himself. Only a few hours ago he had been trying to kill her on his employer’s orders. Now he was sitting outside her room in order to make sure she didn’t kill herself. His life was a pot of ironic mishaps.

He knew she would be a problem.

 *~*~*~*

Kaoru was huddled on the floor in a corner of the room, her knees tucked under her chin and her arms wrapped around herself. She fought to control her breathing and the tears that were streaming unchecked. But the nightmare had been so vivid.

Kaoru pressed into herself, struggling to push down the flood of memories.

The hordes of bodies. The feeling of being crushed and lost in the mass of racing bodies. The terrifying sounds that the horrible creatures made.

The experiment with the rats had only been a few days ago and the images were still plaguing Kaoru’s dreams. After all the observations had been recorded, Kaoru had spent hours huddled in a corner of her room, her hands over her ears and her eyes shut tightly. Aoshi had spent an hour searching for her on the compound. When he had finally found her, she was still curled up in the corner. It had taken another hour to coax her from her hiding place. And even when Aoshi had helped Kaoru to stand, her eyes had darted about nervously and she twitched with anxiety. Finally, Megumi had to pump her full of sedatives – enough to keep her comatose for a day.

The next day, Kaoru had arrived for the post-experiment interviews with her usual peppy and cheerful attitude. But Megumi had still noticed the jumpiness in her actions. The observation had been duly noted and Megumi’s supervisors had been very interested with that fact. Kaoru’s initial reaction to the experiment did not simply disappear. In fact, she remained jumpy for a while before returning to her normal self.

But Megumi had outright refused to repeat the experiment. She had argued long and hard with her supervisor, claiming that Kaoru needed time to recuperate. After a long and bitter discussion, the supervisor had finally relented and allowed Kaoru a day of schooling and then simple interviews and tests instead of a repeat of the rat experiment.

Both Aoshi and Megumi had been relieved. Kaoru had acted cheerfully oblivious.

But her anxiety had shown through.

Now, wrapped in her own arms in the darkness of an unfamiliar room, Kaoru was having trouble keeping herself from hyperventilating. The fear left over from her nightmare was sending her senses into overdrive. She fought with herself, struggling to push back the barrage of images and memories.

In her state of heightened sensitivity, she heard the slight rustle of fabric against the wooden door of the bedroom. Her head snapped up and she stared at the door fearfully. Something was outside the door.

Kaoru fought for rationality.

Then she remembered. Outside that door was the only other occupant of the apartment. It was her redheaded attacker. Her heart leaped in fear.

But he was human.

Human.

Kaoru wiped away her tears with the back of her hand and rose to her feet unsteadily. Concentrating on the faint glimmer of light coming from the crack under the door, she swayed forward.

At least he was human; she rationalized, trying not to remember the staring eyes of the people he had killed.

With great difficulty, Kaoru made it to the door and reached out a trembling hand to touch the wood surface with her fingertips. Breathing shallowly, she sank to her knees before the door, letting her fingertips trail along the wood. She pressed her forehead against the door and listened.

Breathing. Slow, even breathing.

Kaoru inhaled slowly and then exhaled, trying to match her breathing to the sound of his breathing. Gradually, her chest stopped heaving uncontrollably and she was able to breathe at a normal pace. Kaoru turned her back to the door awkwardly and sat, leaning against the hard wood. She concentrated on exhaling and inhaling. Slowly, her mind calmed and she leaned her head back and drifted into a light sleep.

*~*~*~* 

From without, Kenshin wondered what the girl could possibly be doing. He heard her take faltering steps towards the door. Her erratic breathing patterns had agitated him and he had been almost relieved when he heard her rest against the door between them and doze off.

So, at four fifty three in the morning, Kenshin and Kaoru fell asleep back-to-back, separated only by the wood of a bedroom door. 

 *~*~*~*

Megumi stood in the doorway of the hospital room, silently observing her patient. She sighed, flipping her long, black hair over one shoulder.

Aoshi had been carted into the room, bleeding profusely from a gash in his thigh. The gash was deep and the weapon had barely missed severing tendons. Even so, it would be a while before Aoshi would regain the ability to walk. Megumi, like the coroners, had been very confused by the wounds. Bullets could not possibly have made the slash. From the looks of it, a long sharp blade had been the weapon used. The only weapon that matched Aoshi’s injuries was a sword.

Megumi furrowed her brow at the mere thought.

She did not doubt that a sword had made the wounds. But she only knew of one man that could have used a sword against Aoshi in such a way. There was only one man.

Battousai.

The nickname caused a feeling of dread to settle in the pit of her stomach. Battousai was a dangerous man, known only through rumours in the underground of Kyoto. Megumi, despite her impeccable service record, was very well acquainted with the seedier dealings of Kyoto criminals.

Her present employer had recruited her right before her sentencing in court. He had offered her a deal: work on a secret project and be exonerated. Since prison did not appeal to Megumi, she had accepted.

But now, if Battousai was involved, it meant that someone very powerful was after Kaoru-chan. And the thought frightened Megumi.

She walked over to the bed where Aoshi was still unconscious and placed a hand on his burning forehead. Drawing in a deep breath, Megumi willed him to wake up soon and bring their Kaoru back. 

 *~*~*~*

When sunrays began to stream heat into the bedroom, Kaoru awoke from a very uncomfortable sleeping position. She uncurled herself from her spot beside the door and tried to brush away her dried tears.

“You are awake?”

Kaoru jumped at the sound of the voice vibrating through the door. Then she promptly recalled why she had been curled up by the door. She shivered involuntarily.

“Yes,” she answered meekly.

Kenshin was sitting cross-legged, leaning against the door. He pulled himself up slowly and began to fiddle with the key to unlock the door.

Kaoru heard him about to unlock the door and scrambled to her feet – in time to realize that she was only wearing a t-shirt. As Kenshin was turning the doorknob, Kaoru suddenly pulled at it with all her might.

“No!”

Kenshin froze. “What?”

“I’m,” Kaoru began to stammer, a blush rising, “I’m not…I’m not yet-”

She heard a loud sigh come from the other room. “You’ve been through my wardrobe already, haven’t you?”

Kaoru nodded. Then remembered one cannot usually hear nods. “Uh,” she said, somewhat embarrassed, “Yes?”

“So,” came the reply, “Just get a pair of pants or something.”

“Yours?” she exclaimed incredulously.

“You don’t have to if you’d rather wear your school uniform.”

Kenshin left the door unlocked and padded back towards the kitchenette. He had actually been awake since the first ray of sunlight and had already cooked up a small breakfast. Needless to say, the assassin felt very odd – what with providing a meal for his former target and all. It confused him to no end. He felt like a babysitter and a prison warden all at once.

He picked the phone up and dialled. “Takasugi-san?” he began, “This is Himura. The job needs clothes and I don’t have any for her.”

An angry reply buzzed in his ear.

“No, I don’t think it’s too early to call, sir,” Himura replied politely and then paused, listening. “Yes, sir. Tonight.”

He replaced the phone and turned to the stovetop. Picking up a ladle, he began spooning miso soup into two small bowls.

A few moments later, Kaoru emerged quietly from the room wearing the black t-shirt she had borrowed the night before and a pair of draw string jogging pants – the only thing she could find that would fit her. With a tiny smirk, she reckoned that her assailant would find the mess she had left in tearing through his wardrobe.

Kenshin looked up at her as she entered the living area. “Good morning,” he greeted her civilly, though without a smile.

Kaoru raised an eyebrow at him and the ladle. She wondered how he could transform from ultimate assassin to housewife in the blink of an eye. “Good morning,” she replied tentatively.

“Breakfast is almost ready,” Kenshin said politely, though in a cold, deadpan voice.

Kaoru nodded and found something to stare at. She, also, felt out of place. Wearing a killer’s clothes and being served breakfast by a killer was something she had not ever anticipated. Walking up to the mantle piece, she stared up at the swords.

They were, in short, ancient.

But there was something beautiful about the deadly weapons, she noted to herself. She reached out a hesitant finger and ran it along the sheath of the smaller sword. Suddenly, she had an urge to grasp it and hold it in her hands.

Kenshin turned to ask if she would like an egg, ladle still in hand, just as she reached out to grab the sword.

“Don’t!” his voice boomed loudly from across the room.

Kaoru, startled, turned to stare, her hand frozen in place. Kenshin was staring at her with ferocious intensity.

“Don’t touch it,” he commanded angrily.

Kaoru drew her hand back suddenly, staring at him. The passion in his golden eyes overwhelmed her. What would make him so protective over his disgusting swords? At the moment, she didn’t wish to find out.

Kenshin watched her slowly retract her hand from touching the sword breathed a sigh of relief inwardly. He turned back to the pot of soup, completely forgetting about the egg. He stirred the pot with the ladle a few times, waiting for his boiling emotions to cool. No one was ever permitted to touch his swords. No one. Not ever.

Those swords were his burden alone.

When Kenshin turned back around with the two bowls in hand, his face once again emotionless, he found Kaoru still frozen in place. He walked around the bar and deposited the bowls beside the other food on the small dinette table.

Then he stood and waited.

And Kaoru remained frozen and stared.

Kenshin counted to ten in his mind, wondering how he would get the girl to eat. Finally shrugging, he sat and began eating himself. She could eat after he had left for all he cared, as long as she ate. Kenshin ate slowly and with dignity, chewing each morsel completely before swallowing.

Kaoru watched her attacker eat, slowly relaxing from her frozen stance. She knew instinctively that the other setting of food was for her, but she refused to join him in eating. So, without any other course of action in sight, she watched him slowly eat his meal. Kaoru was amazed at the refined and meticulous manner in which the killer ate. She was also amazed by the fact that the man ate without a hint of emotion, pleasure or distaste evident on his facial features. He simply ate – as if it were a necessary evil of life.

When the last bit of food had been eaten, Kenshin rose and brought his dishes to the sink. He walked around the room, pausing to look at Kaoru who was still standing before the fireplace.

“Eat,” he said simply.

Then Kenshin walked down the hallway to the bathroom. Kaoru, for the second time, heard the bathroom door lock.

Inhaling deeply, Kaoru strode towards the dinette and stared down at the setting of food. A bowl of miso soup, a small bowl of rice and a plate of omelette were neatly arranged on the table. Kaoru thought of disdaining the food offered by such a ruthless killer, but her stomach growled loudly in protest. Sighing, Kaoru pulled out the simple wooden chair and sat, gingerly picking up the chopsticks. She began to eat, chewing the food slowly. Surprised by how good it tasted, her face lit up slightly – having not eaten since the previous afternoon.

 *~*~*~*

Kenshin let the burning water flow over him while he stretched out the kinks in his tight muscles. He finished up a quick shower and left the bathroom, still wrapped in his sleeping robe with his hair damp once again. He walked out into the living area and threw a glance at the girl. Her back was to him but he saw her stiffen and her hand freeze mid-bite as she sensed his emergence. Ignoring this, he entered his bedroom and closed the door. Kenshin flung his robe across the bed and turned to search through his wardrobe for clothes.

He raised an eyebrow upon seeing the tangle of clothes spilled out on the floor and messed up in the wardrobe. Ignoring the mess, he pulled out a non-descript black sweater and jeans. Without turning to the large vanity mirror, he ran his fingers through his hair and pulled it up into a high ponytail. He deftly secured his long red hair with an elastic and then shook the tangles out of his long hair.

*~*~*~* 

Kaoru finished her meal and stood, picking up her dishes. She padded hesitantly around the bar and to the kitchen. She deposited her dishes in the sink and began to run water over them. Picking up a soapy sponge that lay beside the sink, she casually began to scrub her dishes clean, running the warm water over them and depositing them in the dish rack to dry. Briefly, with the water running over her hands, she looked down at the killer’s dishes. Without much thought, she picked his up too and cleaned them. Rinsing her hands and wringing them out, she turned with a soft sigh.

She turned and was met with the intense stare of her captor. She matched his stare, dismissing the brief urge to explain herself to him. The man stared back.

Then he turned abrubtly and sat in the leather armchair that faced the fireplace. He placed his arms on the armrests and stared up for a moment at the swords. Dropping his head slightly and closing his eyes, he sat quietly. Kaoru remained rooted to her place behind the bar. After all, the situation was quite confusing. How was one to act around a man who had tried to kill her, but now was not trying to kill her but who would not let her leave?

“You don’t have to stay there all day,” the redhead said quietly from under the shadow of the swords.

Uncertainly, Kaoru came out from behind the bar and approached the armchair facing his. She eased herself into the leather seat, grimacing at the sounds the material made. She stared at the man who sat across from her.

He was a mystery to her. A cold, violent and deadly assassin one minute, ferociously passionate the next, and then finally calm, collected and sedate. But always, she thought, a sense of cold distance surrounded him.

Kaoru studied the killer in front of her curiously. His red hair was again tightly pulled up but his red bangs still fell over his face. His lips were set in a hard line and his features were stiff. From the tightness of his jaw and the stillness of his eyelids, Kaoru knew he was not sleeping. Even though his black knit sweater was loose, Kaoru could sense the tight, lean muscles that lay beneath. From the rigid position of his calloused fingers, she could see the extreme tension that strung his body together.

Kaoru sighed, certain of a long day spent in uncomfortable silence. She leaned back in her chosen seat underneath the swords and stared up at the ceiling. 

 *~*~*~*

“Takani-san,” a deep voice rumbled from the doorway.

Megumi looked up quickly from her seat beside Aoshi’s bed. Her boss stood in the doorway. She stood.

“Still asleep is he?” the tall, dark man asked, “When do you expect him to get up?”

Megumi shook her head slowly. “Not for another day or two,” she answered in a low voice, “And even then, he won’t be capable of fighting.”

The big man sighed. “Ah worthless boy,” he complained, “Getting his ass kicked so soon.”

Megumi frowned at her boss. “It was Battousai,” she defended.

“Well, that’s obvious,” the hulking figure beside her responded, “So what?”

Megumi gawked at him.

“What?” the man said with a twisted smirk, “No faith in our ninja here?”

“Battousai is a demon! It’s a miracle Aoshi is still in one piece. If Kaoru hadn’t hidden him-”

She was interrupted by a deep chuckle. “Ah,” he rumbled, “Our racoon did something interesting, now didn’t she?”

Megumi sighed. Obviously the conversation would go nowhere.

“In any case,” she reported, “Aoshi will be out of action for a week at least.”

Her boss ran his fingers through his chin length hair. “Stupid brat,” he commented dryly. 

 *~*~*~*

“Takasugi Shinsaku,” the secretary announced into the phone, “is on line one for you, sir.”

“Shinsaku?”

“Sir, Battousai has the project in his apartment.”

“And?”

“He wants clothes for her.”

“Bring clothes over then.”

“Sir?”

“Yes, Shinsaku?”

“Are you sure this is the best arrangement? We could just keep her in one of our safe houses.”

“There are reasons for this arrangement, Shinsaku.”

“Yes, sir.”

“Report to me on the project’s conditions tonight. And deliver orders to Himura when you make your visit.”

“Understood.”

“Shall we test it a bit tonight, then?”

“Yes, Katsura-san.” 

  *~*~*~*

It was nearing nine o’clock in the evening when a sharp knock interrupted the silence of Kenshin’s apartment.

Slowly, Kenshin rose from his seat and walked across the room to the entrance. Kaoru shook the half-sleep from her eyes and brushed her eyes with the back of her hand. Kenshin opened the door and a tall, lanky man sauntered in. The man had short scraggly hair and a generous portion of stubble on his chin. Obviously a man who stayed up late.

“So,” Takasugi drawled pleasantly, eyeing Kaoru, “This is the girl you brought home last night?”

Kaoru steamed red and Kenshin began to protest.

Takasugi guffawed and stepped towards Kaoru, holding out a plastic shopping bag. He stood above her sitting form and tapped her lightly on the head with the bottom of the pink bag. Kaoru backed away from him, eyes wary and hostile. Takasugi simply chuckled.

“Don’t be so cold, little Miss,” he chortled, “I’m the guy who saved your cute butt. Yep, you owe your life to me.”

Kaoru glared at him angrily. “Don’t talk to me so familiarly,” she hissed.

The man dropped the pink plastic bag into her lap with a laugh. Then he crashed backwards into the large leather sofa.

“Quite a feisty one, isn’t she?” he said with a smirk, “Enjoying yourself, Himura-kun?”

Kenshin raised an eyebrow impassively.

Kaoru, meanwhile, began to pull out some of the clothes. A tiny pink tank top, a denim short skirt, a black tube top. She stared into the bag incredulously.

“I can’t wear these!”

Takasugi laughed. “Well, there’s the rub. Those are the clothes you’re getting, my dear. Wear them well - unless you want to go around in your school uniform. Of course,” Takasugi said, his finger scratching his stubbly chin thoughtfully, “That wouldn’t be so bad either.” He guffawed loudly and then said, “C’mon, those are my little sister’s clothes!”

Kaoru looked up at the man from her rummaging and glared at him. “Is your sister a slut?”

Takasugi placed a finger to his chin and stared up at her with a grin. “Actually, yes. She is.”

Kaoru grabbed the bag and stood up, throwing Takasugi a dirty look. She marched off to the bathroom and slammed the door behind her.

“As I said,” Takasugi commented, a serious tone entering his voice, “Quite the feisty one.” He turned to Kenshin who was making his way back to the armchair. “How are you fairing with her in your apartment?”

“Take her to a safe house,” came Kenshin’s frosty reply.

“Katsura-san wants her here.”

Kenshin sighed. “As he wishes.”

“Anyway,” Takasugi continued, drawing a small black envelope from his back pocket and tossing it to Kenshin, “This is for you. Take care of it tonight.”

Kenshin caught the envelope deftly and tucked it into his pocket. “Another assignment so soon?”

Takasugi shrugged.

“But what will I do with her?”

“Just lock her up here. The building managers will make sure she doesn’t leave.”

“Fine.”

“Oh,” Takasugi remarked casually, “I invited some of our colleagues over for drinks. They should be breaking your door down any minute.”

“Fine.” 

 *~*~*~*

Kaoru turned the knobs of the faucet, stopping the flow of steaming water that filled the wide bathtub. After locking herself into the bathroom angrily, Kaoru had wondered at the size of the bathroom. It was nearly as big as the kitchen. There was a separate shower and a huge bathtub and a basin of a sink and a separate room with the toilet. Many thick towels hung from many towel racks around the spacious and lavishly tiled bathroom. Kaoru shrugged; all the better for her bath.

She slowly undressed, letting the killer’s clothes fall to the tiled floor. She pulled a pale pink, silk bathrobe from the plastic bag and hung it from a peg near the tub. Gently, she began into ease herself into the wonderfully hot water. Sinking up to her chin, she let her muscles loosen and let her breathing slow. Kaoru languorously lifted her dripping limbs one at a time, relishing the feel of the soothing liquid streaming across her naked skin.

 *~*~*~*

Just as Takasugi had predicted, men began to arrive at Kenshin’s apartment. Each time a new, raucous man would arrive, Kenshin would open the door politely, let them in, and lock the door again. Just as Kaoru was beginning to fall asleep in the bath, close to ten men filled the apartment.

Some of the men were big and burly; others were thin and snake-like; still others were tall and medium-built. Some men lounged at the bar, sipping or chugging Kenshin’s liquor. The others were sprawled in various positions on the leather sofas, laughing and joking loudly. Kenshin sat silently listening in his armchair, his face betraying no emotion.

Kaoru, on the other hand, had been jolted from her doze by the boisterous noise-makers. Irritated, she pushed herself up and sat in the gradually cooling water. Tendrils of her black hair clung to her back and her breasts. She splashed water on her face and decided that her short respite from reality was over. The water swished around her nude legs as she stood and stepped delicately from the tub.

Forgetting to pull the plug from the tub, she wrapped the silky, pink bathrobe around herself and secured it tightly at her waist. She advanced to the floor length mirrors on one wall and stared at herself. She pulled at the tie in her long hair and let her hair fall loose. Her hair fell down to the middle of her back, black and thick. She combed at her bangs, straightening them, and wished for a brush.

Kaoru picked up the pink plastic bag that held the indecent clothes and unlocked the door. She pushed the door open a crack and the noise from the rowdy men greeted her. Steeling herself, she walked out and padded down the hallway.

Cat calls and whistles erupted from the men suddenly. Takasugi and Kenshin turned to see the girl emerge from the dark hallway, her black hair streaming down her back and her body barely concealed by a thin, pink bathrobe. She stood, feet apart and chin lifted, and stared at each of the men defiantly. Kenshin stopped himself from sighing. That same defiance quickly earned her a round of loud hooting and lewd shouts from his colleagues. The girl headed for the bedroom and slammed the door behind her.

“Himura! What’s with the chick?”

“You finally indulging in some manly pleasures?”

“A high school looker on top of it all!”

Kenshin shot the men dark stares and they instinctively stepped back slightly.

“Not particularly wise to tease Battousai about something sensitive,” Takasugi chuckled.

“Yes,” A muscled man with black hair tied up much like Kenshin’s commented, “But she’s quite the treat, isn’t she?”

Kenshin resisted the urge to roll his eyes and instead glared at the man. “She’s not my whore.”

“Whose is she then?”

“Genji-san,” Kenshin said icily, “Can’t you ever be serious?”

The man called Genji laughed, rubbing his muscular arms and pushing up the sleeves of his tight white t-shirt even more. “Can’t you appreciate a beautiful woman, Himura-kun?”

Kenshin arched a dark eyebrow. “You mean teenager?”

“All the better,” Genji drawled, a malicious glint entering his eyes, “It’s much more fun when they’re young and tender.”

Kenshin turned away, letting a bit of his disgust show on his finely chiseled features. Genji only laughed, slapping his blue-jeaned thighs. Takasugi watched the interaction with a slight grin on his face. The two did the same job for their employer and yet they were totally different. Genji was unrestrained, often using his strength to take whatever pleased him. Kenshin was cool and always distant. The interaction between them had been so easy to predict.

“Well,” Genji laughed as he stood, “I need a drink.”

Kenshin did not even acknowledge him. Instead he turned to Takasugi. “Why did you invite him?”

Takasugi shrugged and grinned.

 *~*~*~*

Kaoru had found a brush. She sat on the bed and slowly brushed though her hair, trying to ignore the noise outside. Setting the brush down, she rolled her head around and shrugged her shoulders a few times, trying to ease the tension that had built up so quickly in her muscles.

Suddenly she jumped up and stared.

The door swung open silently and a tall figure stepped into the room quickly, shutting the door behind him. Kaoru stood on guard, suddenly very nervous.

“Hello,” the stranger greeted her gently, “How are you?”

Kaoru stared daggers at the man, quickly sizing him up.

“I’m Genji,” the man said sweetly, taking a step forward, “And you are?”

Kaoru remained silent, searching the room mentally for a weapon. Genji was a tall, muscular man wearing a tight white t-shirt and blue jeans. His long black hair was in a high ponytail. She continued to glare at the man, backing up slightly when he took another step towards her.

“So,” Genji growled, the sweet tone dropping from his deep voice, “You’re not going to be easy are you?” Then he grinned, sending a chill down Kaoru’s spine. “More fun for me, then.”

Not a moment too soon, Kaoru ducked out of the way as Genji lunged at her. She ran, putting the bed between them.

“My sweet,” Genji coaxed with false sweetness, “Don’t play hard to get.”

Not giving her a chance to react, he dived across the bed and grabbed at her. Kaoru evaded his arms but he caught a hold of the edge of her bathrobe. She gritted her teeth and threw a vicious kick at his head, all the while trying to keep her robe closed. Genji rolled out of the way but lost his grip on her clothing.

“Little bitch,” he snarled angrily, “I’m not going to go easy on you now.”

With his face twisted into a wicked scowl, he sprang at her suddenly and pushed her into the wall, his big hands on her shoulders. Kaoru hit the wall hard and her head snapped backwards painfully. She attempted to knee him in the groin but he anticipated her move and pushed his body up against hers roughly, preventing her from doing anything but stomping on his feet - which, of course, she did with a vengeance.

Genji swore and planted one of his hands on her throat. He pushed at her neck harshly and she struggled angrily as he lowered his face to hers.

“Now,” he murmured cruelly, his breath hot on her face, “Don’t be impatient. You’ll get it – don’t worry.”

Kaoru felt bile rise in her throat even as she struggled to breath. His grip on her throat tightened painfully and spots began to dance before her eyes. Even so, she was painfully aware that his other hand had left her shoulder and had begun to snake between the folds of her robe.

Her mind screamed but her body could not overcome him. She felt desperation take control.

It had to be done.

There was no choice.

Kaoru struggled to lift her arm. Since Genji knew she could now put no real force in any sort of attack, he ignored her as she reached toward his face with her slender fingertips.

Kaoru inhaled deeply, preparing.

She had no choice.

He was going to…

Steeling herself, she shut her eyes tightly. 

 *~*~*~*

Sudden, piercing and wild screams interrupted all drinking, laughing, thinking. All eyes were on the bedroom door. Some chuckled knowingly, seeing that Genji had ‘disappeared’. The screams continued – gaining in intensity and volume.

Kenshin jumped to his feet and strode to the bedroom quickly. He flung the door open and Takasugi peered over his shoulder into the semi-darkness of the room.

What they saw surprised them.

Kaoru was crouched on the floor in the center of the room, howling bloody murder and tearing at her long hair. A wild, crazed look was glazed over her eyes.

Genji was plastered to the wall; he was slightly off-color and he had a hand to his head, as if in pain. He looked up at Kenshin and Takasugi.

“What the fuck?”

Kenshin stared at him coldly. Takasugi raised his eyebrows. Then all three turned to Kaoru.

“What the hell is with that girl?” Genji asked, annoyed bewilderment in his voice, “Make her shut the fuck up! I have a damn headache.”

Genji was ignored. Kenshin took a step toward Kaoru who had not stopped shrieking madly.

Kaoru rose to her feet but she remained doubled over, her eyes wild. She was pulling her hair crazily and tears began to streak down her face.

The blood. She felt the blood fill her, coat her, drown her. She heard the screams, the pleas, the pain. She brought her hands to her throat and then clutched at her chest, as if something were eating at her. She felt the devil inside of her. It clawed at her insides, taunting her with images of dying men, weeping girls. She shuddered at the sensations crawling under her skin – pain caused by her hands, fear at her presence and the blood. Oh the stench of blood was driving her insane! 

Kenshin advanced slowly, as one would approach a cornered animal.

Kaoru looked up at him through wild, distraught eyes.

“Battousai,” she growled menacingly, “Stay away, Battousai.”

Kenshin stopped abruptly, surprise written on his face. How had she known? To his knowledge, she had never been acquainted with his nickname.

Kaoru glared at him, her eyes glazing over and rolling back into her head. She began to shriek again and tear at her hair violently. Kenshin did the only thing he could think of. He marched up to her as quickly as he could, drew back his hand and slapped her.

Kaoru’s hand went up to her burning cheek automatically and she shrunk back against the wall, away from him. The sharp sting of his calloused hand against her face shocked her into a fearful silence.

“Well that was interesting,” Takasugi commented, brushing at his chin with his fingers.

“I don’t think it’s quite over yet,” Kenshin replied, watching as Kaoru whimpered, tears still running down her face and eyes glazed and unseeing.

“Who the fuck is that girl, dammit?” Genji demanded angrily.

Kenshin and Takasugi both turned to stare at Genji. Kenshin frowned, confused.

“What the hell?”

Chapter 5: sympathize

I am consumed by the night.

Consumed by their hate

Consumed by their blood lust

Kenshin and Takasugi stared, dumbfounded, at Genji. The dark-haired assassin stared back, clutching at his head in pain. Genji looked confused, lost and very, very angry.

“What do you mean, you idiot?” Kenshin fairly snarled at the dazed man.

“What the fuck do you think I mean, Battousai?” Genji growled back angrily, “I want to know who the hell that girl is, why she’s screaming her bloody head off and what the hell I’m doing in this shitty room!”

“You mean,” Takasugi interrupted the assassins’ death glare calmly, “You don’t remember?”

“Remember what, you shaggy freak?” Genji spat, “Dammit!”

A deep growl emanated from Kenshin’s chest as he began to advance on Genji angrily. He was stopped by a firm hand on his shoulder.

“Don’t,” Takasugi ordered quietly.

Kenshin turned back. “You believe him?” he questioned incredulously.

Takasugi shrugged in response. Then he pointed at Kaoru who was quivering in the corner, shaking her head wildly and looking as if she would break out in another round of screams at any moment.

“Do something about the girl first.”

Kenshin shot one last death glare at Genji and turned towards Kaoru. She was taking deep breaths and clutching at her chest. She continued shaking her head, as if there was something she wanted to shake out of herself. As Kenshin got closer to her slowly, she turned to look at him with her glazed eyes. Her face twisted between an angry snarl and a plea for help.

In one swift move, Kenshin swept her off her feet and carried her out of the room. Ignoring her fitful attempts to escape from his rough grip on her, he carried her down the hall to the bathroom. Behind him, Takasugi emerged, pushing Genji along. Raising a hand, he silenced the men who were throwing vulgar taunts at Kenshin’s retreating back. With a grim smirk, he waved his hand towards the door. The men, understanding the meaning of the gesture quite clearly, sobered up and headed for the door. Takasugi, second in command of their elusive organization, pulled a set of keys from around his neck and unlocked the door for them. When the last of the rowdy visitors had left, Takasugi pushed Genji out unceremoniously and shut and re-locked the door. Then, pressing his lips together in a cynical smirk, he headed for the bathroom. 

Kenshin kicked the bathroom door open and surveyed the tub full of lukewarm water that Kaoru had neglected to drain. Still grasping a kicking Kaoru in his arms, he strode quickly to the tub. Without a word, he brusquely dropped Kaoru into the tub, the cool water splashing around noisily. At once, Kaoru inhaled sharply and started to jump up again. Tightening his lips, Kenshin grabbed her by the shoulders and pushed her completely under the water, releasing her as soon as her head went under. He pushed up the sopping sleeves of his black sweater and watched as Kaoru surfaced, coughing and sputtering, from the water, pushing back dripping strands of hair from her face.

Kenshin stood back with his hands on his hips, waiting to see her eyes. Kaoru blinked rapidly, still wiping the dripping water from her forehead. Kenshin watched her eyes intently and noted with satisfaction that they were no longer strangely glazed over.

Takasugi chose that moment to waltz into the bathroom, a toothpick protruding from the corner of his mouth. He grinned widely, also noting the change in Kaoru’s demeanour.

“Good work, Himura-kun,” Takasugi said, slapping Kenshin on the back.

Kenshin remained impassive, still staring down at the shivering teenager. Kaoru, starting to notice her surroundings and situation, quickly folded her arms over her chest. The thin robe was soaked through and the flimsy material clung to her skin, showing every detail of her body.

“What did you do to Genji?” Kenshin demanded in a low voice, “And how did you know the name Battousai?”

Kaoru glared up at him, her eyes flashing angrily. “Why won’t you leave me alone?”

Kenshin’s eyes narrowed into slits. “I demand to know.”

Takasugi simply leaned against the doorframe, watching their interaction with interest. The wide grin never left his face.

“Just leave me alone!” Kaoru shouted, angrily flinging water at him. She covered her face with her hands, hunching over in the water.

“Get out of the water,” Kenshin commanded.

Kaoru looked up from her hands. “Are you insane?” she argued irately, “With the two of you old perverts in here?”

Kenshin glowered down at the difficult girl. “Get out!” he repeated, anger seeping into his voice.

“Make me,” Kaoru hissed at him.

Kenshin stepped furiously towards the bathtub, his eyes scowling with fury. Reaching down, he hoisted her up by her upper arm. Kaoru protested angrily and attempted to wrench herself from his iron-like grip. One foot slipped on the slippery ceramic of the tub and her weight was transferred to the other foot all at once. Kaoru cried out suddenly in pain, reaching down for her injured ankle and falling forward.

Kenshin caught the girl in the crook of his arm as she fell forward. He dragged her from the tub and, with his free arm, pulled a towel from the rack and wrapped it around her shoulders. Kaoru inhaled sharply and pulled back from him, clutching at the ends of the towel around her. She faltered, pain shooting up her calf and she winced. Kenshin grabbed her by the shoulders and steadied her in place. Kaoru looked up into his face, surprise registering in her features. Kenshin stepped away, hopelessly brushing the water from his sweater. He opened a mirrored closet and pulled a long, terry cloth bathrobe from a hangar. He extended the bathrobe to her with one arm. She stared at him blankly. She crossed her arms over her chests as tightly as she could and huddled under the large towel.

Takasugi chuckled loudly, breaking the tension. “Ah,” he laughed aloud, “It’s been a long time since I’ve seen a modest girl. I’ll be waiting for the two of you in the living room.” He waved over his shoulder and left the bathroom.

Kaoru pulled the bathrobe from Kenshin’s fingers gingerly. “Well,” she said, glaring at him, “Aren’t you going?”

“No.”

“And you expect me to change?” she demanded, her voice rising a notch.

“Yes,” he replied with a severe stare, “And hurry it up too.”

Kaoru felt her hair practically rise in anger. “You,” she stammered incoherently, “Insufferable, inconsiderate-” She nearly stamped her foot. “Why won’t you let me change in peace?”

“Because,” Kenshin said, glaring at her, his eyes mere slits, “You’ll lock the door and won’t come out until I leave. Then I’ll never get any answers.”

She opened and closed her mouth, struck speechless. That was, in fact, exactly what she had been planning. Kenshin frowned at her threateningly and turned his back to her swiftly.

“So change,” he commanded, “Now.”

“Don’t turn around,” she warned him, dropping the towel to the floor.

“Who do you take me for?” Kenshin snorted, “I’m not that fool Genji.”

Kaoru slipped from the pink bathrobe as quickly as she could. Glancing furtively at the man in front of her, she pulled on the terry cloth bathrobe tightly. Kenshin turned around as soon as she had finished tying the knot. Another glaring contest ensued.

“Lovebirds,” Takasugi bellowed from the living room, “There’s no time for a quickie. Get the hell out here!”

Kaoru turned red up to the roots of her hair. Kenshin arched an eyebrow and turned towards the door. He marched into the main living area. Kaoru followed at a slower pace, wrapping her arms around herself protectively. Kenshin sat, leaning back into his armchair, and Takasugi was sprawled out on the couch. The two men watched the girl as she hesitantly sat, drawing her knees under herself, in the armchair nearest the fireplace.  

Kenshin opened his mouth to demand information but Takasugi beat him to it.

“So,” Takasugi drawled, “Want to tell us what happened?”

Kaoru glared at the man, anger mounting.

“You knew,” she hissed, “You set the damn thing up.”

Takasugi leaned back with a smirk. “Maybe I did; maybe I didn’t. But now I want to know what you did and how you did it.”

“Why should I tell you?”

“You’re in our possession, we already saw what happened in there and you don’t really have anything to lose anyway,” he counted off the reasons on his long fingers, “So why don’t you just make it easy on yourself?”

Kenshin looked from Takasugi to Kaoru and then back again, clenching his fists. Something was passing between the two that he couldn’t grasp.

Sensing the battle aura beginning to rage around the assassin, Takasugi rolled his head over to look at Kenshin. “Himura, wouldn’t you like to know what happened?”

“Yes,” Kenshin said dangerously, “What did you do and how did you know my name?”

Kaoru’s eyes did not leave Takasugi’s face. “Why don’t you tell him, Takasugi-san,” Kaoru said curtly, “Since you already know what is going on?”

Takasugi smiled widely. “Ah, but it would be so much more enlightening if you would,” he purred.

“But you would know all about what happened tonight, wouldn’t you?” she drawled sarcastically, “So you should do the honours.”

Takasugi paused for a moment and changed strategies. He could feel Kenshin’s patience quickly wearing thin.

“My dear,” he said with a false frown, “I didn’t know you were one to use your ability so flippantly.”

Kaoru’s eyes widened as she glared angrily at him. “You dare,” she said through clenched teeth, “The man was going to…to RAPE me. And you dare-”

“He was one of ours,” Takasugi interrupted harshly. “Granted,” he added thoughtfully, “A stupid member – but nonetheless, one of ours. And you,” he said, pointing, “Did something to him – what exactly was it?”

Kaoru narrowed her eyes at him suspiciously. “Who told you? How did you find out about me?”

Takasugi clucked his tongue and chided, “I am the one asking the questions here, sweetheart.”

Kaoru gritted her teeth. “I will tell you nothing,” she declared.

“I suggest you explain yourself,” Kenshin’s cold voice came from across the living area.

“Ask your boss if you want an explanation!” Kaoru shot him an angry glare and spat, “I owe you nothing.”

Kenshin rose from his seat slowly. “Explain it to me now. Explain what you did to Genji. Explain what happened to you. Explain how you knew my name. Now.”

Kaoru snorted and looked away. Kenshin walked slowly around the coffee table and towards her chair, his cold fury mounting with each step.

“I would advise you to speak,” he warned in a deadly whisper.

Kaoru closed her eyes and kept her head turned away from him. Kenshin reached down and grabbed a handful of Kaoru’s hair, pulling her upwards painfully.

“Tell me now, you freak,” he hissed, shaking her head by her hair, “Tell me now or I will slit your throat.”

“Then kill me!” she cried suddenly, refusing to open her eyes, enraged tears spilling over her cheeks, “Kill me already and get it over with! I don’t care what you want to know. I don’t care how you intend to use me. I won’t help you! I won’t be your tool!”

Kenshin threw her back against the chair roughly. He walked around to the mantle and pulled the short sword from its rack. He angrily tossed the sheath away and came back around to loom above Kaoru. He reached down again and grasped a handful of her hair, pulling her head back viciously.

“Talk,” he ordered coldly, levelling the tip of the sword to the juncture between her chin and neck.

Kaoru shook her head silently from within his brutal grasp, forcing herself to stop the whimper of pain. 

“Talk!” Kenshin shouted, drawing the tip of the blade from her ear to her neck.

“Why do you care? Why do you need to know?” she exploded angrily, desperately trying to wrench her head from his grasp, “You’re only a tool anyway. A blind, pathetic, unthinking tool!”

Kenshin gripped her hair tighter, as his eyes widened and his teeth clenched in anger.

“Yes,” Kaoru laughed bitterly, “I saw what you do. I saw what you are through that pervert’s eyes. You murder and rape and you enjoy it! You crave blood. You are a blank, emotionless machine who can’t think for yourself and-”

Her barrage of words was stopped suddenly as Kenshin flung her forcefully to the floor by her hair.

“Shut up,” he hissed.

“Why?” Kaoru sneered, trying to ignore the pain, “Because you can’t face what you are? Because you’re a shallow, cruel killer like that pervert?”

“I am nothing like that idiot!” Kenshin erupted, flinging the sword angrily. The short sword flew from his hand and embedded itself into the wall.

Silence covered the room, except for Kenshin’s heavy breathing. “I am nothing like that idiot,” he repeated in a low hiss, “You don’t know anything about me, bitch.”

“And you,” Kaoru whispered, clenching her fists in the thick fabric of the carpet and letting her tears fall from her downcast face, “You don’t know anything about me at all.”   

“I know that you-” Kenshin began angrily.

“That I’m a freak? You know that I’m a freak? Is that it?” Kaoru yelled suddenly, looking up with eyes brilliant with furious tears, “Do you think I wanted the memories of that stupid, violent, disgusting assassin? But it was the only way to stop him. Do you think I wanted to see how he kills people, how he relishes their pain?”

She closed her eyes and shook her head wildly, tears flying from her eyes. “Do you know what a rat sees? Well I do. They made me take the memory of a rat – all for one of their stupid experiments. Do you think I asked for the memories of a rat and an assassin? Do you think I want them?” She bit her lip, trying to control the shuddering in her voice, “So NO, I won’t help you. I won’t be your project or your tool.”

Kaoru shut her eyes tightly, trying desperately to hold her tears and her choked sobs in. Kenshin stared at her, he eyes wide and angry.

“Well,” Takasugi announced, rising, “That was interesting.” He turned to the door. “I’ll be off now. You should get ready for your assignment,” he added to Kenshin.

Kenshin nodded and Takasugi let himself out of the apartment, locking the door from the outside.

“I thought only you had keys,” Kaoru bit out sarcastically, rising to her knees.

Kenshin ignored her completely and walked over to where his short sword was embedded in the wall. He pulled the sword from the wall and pushed it back into its sheath with a loud click. Silently, he struck a match, tossed it into the fireplace and waited for the flames to spring up.

Meanwhile, Kaoru had curled herself up and was leaning against the sofa, brushing the tears away from her cheeks and steadying her breathing. She turned to watch Kenshin.

He fished the black envelope from his pocket and pulled out the slip of paper within. He read the words and committed them to memory.

10 p.m. Shobi Building, South Sanjo. Takeda Kanryu.

Kenshin tossed the envelope and its contents into the fire, watching it burn for a moment before grabbing his belt. He wrapped the belt around his waist and tucked both swords through it – first the short and then the long. Walking past Kaoru, he picked up his long black cloak that was still on the coffee table from the night before and threw it over his shoulders, carefully flipping the thick black material over the swords. He then pulled on his black wrist guards, fitting the covers for the back of his hands carefully. Kenshin glided through the room and unlocked the door. He slipped out without even looking back.

Kaoru heard the door lock on her and she let her head fall to her knees.

Alone, again.

 *~*~*~*

“Katsura-san?”

“Yes?”

“It’s me. Takasugi Shinsaku.”

“How did it go, Shinsaku?”

“As expected, sir. She took everything from him – all the information, all the sensations.”

“Interesting. So her ability is actually much greater than we originally thought.”

“Yes. But she’s not able to handle it.”

“I see. And what of their interaction?”

“Interesting to say the least, Katsura-san.”

“What do you mean by that, Shinsaku?”

“He was affected deeply. I’ve never seen him almost lose it like that.”

“Anger?”

“Yes.”

“Interesting.”

“Should we move her to a safe house now, Katsura-san?”

“No. Leave her there.”

“You won’t be able to use her if she’s dead, sir.”

“He won’t kill her.”

“How can you be sure?”

“He isn’t able to.”

A pause.

“As you wish, sir.”

“Arrange the meeting then.”

“Yes.”

Katsura Kogoro placed the phone back in its cradle and leaned back in his chair. He sighed deeply. It was too bad that the ends of his plans required such difficult means. But, it had to be done.

 *~*~*~*

9:45 p.m.

Battousai glided through the night, attracting attention from the clubbers and drinkers for his shocking red hair but for nothing else. He ignored them all, making straight for the Shobi Building.

Suddenly a scantily clad woman attached herself to his arm, pulling at his cloak.

“Come on, big guy,” she crooned seductively, “I’ll give you a night to remember.”

The prostitute started to slide her hands into Battousai’s cloak. Glancing sidelong at the heavily made up woman, he suddenly pushed her away forcefully. She fell backwards into a pile of wooden crates. Without looking back, he suddenly sprinted away into the darkness.

Battousai headed for the quieter alleys, counting the minutes.  

Kaoru stood slowly and looked for a light switch. She flicked off all the lights, letting darkness fill the apartment. She turned slowly and faced the glowing red embers of the fireplace.

 *~*~*~*

9:59 p.m.

Battousai slowed to a walk and rounded the final corner. The Shobi building was right in front of him. His amber eyes narrowed as he searched the empty streets. He saw the doors to a seedy nightclub open and a tall suited man stepped out, flanked by two hulking bodyguards.

Kaoru threaded her way carefully around the furniture and knelt before the fire, gazing into the hypnotic sparks and flames. She let her mind wander, the memories of many washing over her.

 *~*~*~*

10:01 p.m.

Battousai stepped into the light of a solitary street lamp, directly in the path of the three men who had just exited the nightclub.

“You must be the drug dealer, Takeda Kanryu.”

Takeda regarded the black clothed man with interest. He chuckled softly. “Were you waiting for me?”

“Nothing personal,” Battousai said unemotionally, “But I’m afraid I will have to take your lives.”

“Will you?” Takeda smirked, “And who might you be?”

“Choshu’s Himura Battousai,” Kenshin answered coldly, flicking his sword out with his thumb.

“How arrogant to give your name to-”

The man was cut off suddenly as Battousai rushed forward, his hand on the hilt of his sword.

Kaoru closed her eyes and let slow tears trickle from her cheeks. She wept for the dead, empathizing with their dying pains as the heat from the fire before her burned at her cheeks. She let all the foreign memories brush lightly against her mind. One particular sensation latched onto her consciousness – insanity. Insanity and blood. She picked at the sensation, curious as to its nature and purpose. Suddenly, her mind reeled away from the sensation in fright. The insanity of bloodlust was trying to consume her, even as she shoved it away.

The first bodyguard did not even have time to draw his handgun from inside his suit jacket. Battousai’s long sword flashed out from the sheath and, as he flew past the bodyguard, the sword caught the man in the side, tearing through his stomach and intestines. The man vomited blood and fell forward, dead.

The second bodyguard began shooting almost right away. Battousai rushed at the man, ducking below the bullets. Before the man even knew it, Battousai was under his raised gun arm. He crouched and spun on one leg, his sword swinging upwards. He twisted the handle mid-swing and the blade sliced through the bodyguard’s spine and cut through his jaw. The headless man crumpled to the ground in a messy heap. His blood spurted from his neck and sprayed onto Battousai’s cloak.

Battousai stood and looked over his shoulder to where Takeda Kanryu stood, cowering in fear. Blood dripping from his sword, Battousai turned and faced him, eyes emotionless.

“No,” Takeda pleaded hysterically, “You can have whatever you want. Anything. You name it – I’ll get it for you!”

Battousai didn’t answer. Instead, he lifted his sword and drew it back into a lunge position, blood dripping from the blade and running onto his hands. He silently dashed forward, his eyes intent on Takeda. Takeda cried out frantically in fright and turned to run away. Battousai leapt into the air, transferring his sword to point downwards. Pushing down at the top of the hilt, Battousai plunged the blade into Takeda’s skull as he ran. Takeda’s body immediately went limp, more blood spraying upwards and hitting Battousai in the face. He flipped away from the body, his sword ripping through the back of his victim’s skull. Battousai landed a few feet away.

Eyes shadowed, Battousai stood and, after flicking the blood from his sword, he sheathed it and tucked the hilt back under his cloak. Without looking back, he disappeared into the night, leaving behind a street stained with rivers of blood and littered with three brutally murdered bodies.

When Kenshin unlocked his apartment door and pushed it open, he found it in a state of semi-darkness. Easily adjusting his eyes to the dim light, he saw the dark form of a kneeling figure outlined by the red glow of a dying fire. He closed the door behind him and locked it loudly.

Kaoru heard him enter but did not move and kept her eyes calmly trained upon the fire. Kenshin walked across the room and shrugged his bloodied cloak from his shoulders, tossing it onto the table as always. He pulled off his wrist guards, watching in distaste as some of the dried blood flaked off in the process. Pulling his swords from his belt, he stepped up to the fireplace and stood beside Kaoru’s still figure. He lifted the swords and delicately placed them on their respective racks.

“How many died by your hand tonight?” came a soft, calm question from below him.

Kenshin glanced down at her bowed head. “It’s none of your business.”

Raising her blue eyes to meet his, Kaoru lifted herself from the floor. Kenshin met her gaze and his eyes followed hers as she slowly stood in front of him. 

“Do you ever feel anything? Remorse? Grief? Guilt?”

Kenshin forced himself to stare into her eyes levelly. “You wouldn’t understand.”

“Of course I wouldn’t,” Kaoru smiled sadly, and turned away, “I couldn’t never take pleasure in others’ pain as you do.”

“You don’t understand,” Kenshin said, his voice suddenly strained.

“I don’t?” Kaoru asked, looking back with a small smirk, “But remember, Battousai, I know what you do. You are all the same. You’re a tool like that pervert Genji. An assassin without feeling or conscience – killing for pleasure and for business.”  

All of a sudden, Kenshin’s hand was at her throat and he pushed her back into the wall. Kaoru reached up and grabbed at his bloodied wrist with both hands.

“You don’t understand,” he snarled angrily, “I don’t kill for pleasure. I kill so that naïve, selfish people like you never have to see violence in your prissy neighbourhoods.”   

“I don’t believe you,” Kaoru choked out, defiantly glaring into his burning eyes, “You’re just a mindless killing machine, a bloody pervert – like the rest of them.”

“Is that what you think?” Kenshin seethed, the orange firelight creating fearsome patterns on his face, “Then should I fulfill your expectations just because you have them?”

Kenshin viciously spun her around, pushing her up against the wall. He planted a hand on her back and pinned her to the wall harshly. Pushing his body up against her painfully, his other hand tore at her bathrobe and pushed up her thigh.

Suddenly, he froze.

Kaoru was deathly silent, her entire body still. Kenshin was also frozen in place, his hand still on her upper thigh and his body still pressed closely to hers. He couldn’t see her eyes but he could feel her ragged breathing through her back and the wild beating of her heart.

And yet, she was still as stone. Kenshin watched, entranced, as a single tear rolled down her smooth cheek. And then another slid down her cheek, pooling with the first tear at the base of her jaw. Then, the weight of both tears dragged the tiny bubble of water down until they dropped from her face in a perfect sphere.

Kenshin disengaged himself from the girl, stepping back with his hands lifted in front of him. He stared at his calloused, blood encrusted hands. Feeling his breath begin to race, he spun around suddenly and hurried to the bathroom. He slammed the door behind him and immediately beginning running hot water. He stripped from his bloody clothes as quickly as he could. Pulling the shower plug, he rushed into the hot water. The water scalded his skin but he took it, pulling his hair tie out wildly and opening his arms up to the stream of burning water.

After the blood had been washed down the drain, Kenshin cut the water. He stood in the shower stall with his fists clenched tightly, letting the still steaming water drip from his body. He closed his eyes tightly – the shame still not cleansed.

He had assaulted a mere teenager - a girl probably ten years younger than himself. He pounded a tiled wall with his clenched fist, ignoring the pain that shot through his knuckles. She was a mere child.

Shaking the water from his loose hair, he shoved the shower door open and stepped out. Pulling his blue robe around him, he threw the door to the bathroom open and marched out. He froze at the entrance to the main living area.

She was still standing there, unmoving as a statue. But he noticed the jump in her shoulders as he stepped forward. Kenshin approached the living area slowly.

“Go to bed,” he ordered her quietly, drawing near her and reaching out a tentative hand.

She flinched and drew back, turning to stare at him fearfully. Kenshin retracted his hand quickly. He stepped backwards slowly, moving away from her trembling form. He sank down into his armchair and stretched out his arms on the armrests.

“Sleep,” he repeated his command.

Kaoru simply lowered herself into a huddled ball on the sofa. Kenshin sighed inaudibly and bowed his head, commanding his body to rest and his mind to sleep.

Kenshin dreamed of blood. He dreamed of wielding his sword and killing those he was assigned to. He relived their deaths, one by one. But in his nightmare, the dead did not fall. They kept rising, their bodies mangled and bloody. The bodies threw themselves at Kenshin and he had to slice through them to keep them away. The smell of blood was intoxicating, filling his system and clouding his mind. He screamed, hacking through the bodies madly.

Soft footfalls alerted Kenshin to movement in his apartment in the dead of night. His body automatically tensed to spring as he waited, eyes closed.

Soft breaths on his face.

A slight tugging at the chain around his neck.

Kenshin’s amber eyes suddenly snapped open. His hand darted out with lightning speed and seized the wrist of his assailant.

“Let me go!”

Kenshin’s head snapped up, surprised at the feminine voice. Of course, he berated himself, it was only the girl. Still, he did not let go of her wrist and she pulled at it in vain.

“What do you want?” he demanded quietly. 

“Let me leave,” she pleaded angrily, “I don’t want to stay here anymore!”

“I’m sorry,” Kenshin apologized emotionlessly, “I can’t do that.”

“Why?” she cried, “Because you’ve been ordered to?”

“Just calm down and nothing will happen to you.”

“You mean until you’re ordered to kill me again,” Kaoru laughed bitterly as she continued to tug at her captured wrist, “Or until you lose your cool and lash out at me. Maybe you’ll use one of those swords. Or maybe you’ll strangle me like you almost did before.”

He released her wrist suddenly and she tumbled to the floor backwards. Backing up against the sofa, Kaoru stared through the darkness at Kenshin. The fire had not completely burned out and Kaoru could still make out the outline of his face and the fiery red of his long hair falling over his shoulders. His catlike eyes shone in the faint glow of the fire.

But his expression was not stony as it usually was. Instead, Kaoru noted with wide eyes, his eyes were half-lidded with some emotion akin to guilt. She rubbed her sore wrist. She watched as the slight hint of emotion passed over his severe features.

Was he struggling with himself? When Genji’s memories had overcome her, Kaoru had experienced the moment when his mind gave up control and decency; when he had let himself tumble into carnal pleasure and emotion. Had her captor not yet fallen so far?  

Kenshin also observed her through the orange shadows. Even in the darkness, he could see her emotions as plain as day. The teenager was not capable of hiding her emotions. They were always written clearly on her face – no matter how odd they seemed. And right now, confusion filled her dark eyes.

Kaoru turned away quickly from his intense stare. She could no longer compare him with Genji’s memories. Somehow, they were completely different even though they had the same occupation. The only strain of memory that Kaoru could pin to both was a strange obsession with blood. Her curiosity overwhelmed her and she felt compelled to discover the nature of the assassin’s personality.   

“Before,” Kaoru asked quietly, “Why did you say that?”

“What?”

“About killing so that people in prissy neighbourhoods would never see violence?”

Kenshin snorted softly in the darkness, “You wouldn’t understand.”

“Did you choose to be an assassin?”

“Yes.”

“Why?”

“Because I am skilled enough to accomplish what is necessary.”

“Necessary for what?”

“Controlling society,” Kenshin answered carefully.

Kaoru knit her eyebrows together. “I am not sure I understand.”

“I told you that you wouldn’t.”

 A silent pause filled the dark room.

“Do you find it hard?” Kaoru asked curiously.

“What?”

“You know,” she began, “controlling the insanity.”

“What are you talking about?”

“Well,” she answered, talking slowly into the darkness, “When I received Genji’s memories, I became aware of his insanity. He was always teetering on the edge. But at some point, I think he just went crazy. Or, gave in to blood lust. Or something like that – his mind was so frightening.”

“Yes.”

“Yes what?”

“Yes,” Kenshin said, taking a deep breath, “I find it hard to control the insanity that comes with being an assassin.”

“I see.”

For a few minutes, all that could be heard was breathing. Realization began to dawn on the teenager. Using the carnal mind of Genji as a reference, Kaoru began to appreciate the struggle against the insanity of bloodlust. Kaoru broke the silence once again.

“Do you enjoy your occupation?”

“Didn’t you ask me that already?”

“Well, you never really answered.”

“Fine then,” Kenshin muttered softly, “No. I don’t. Are you satisfied now?”

Kaoru ignored his last statement and peered through the darkness at him. “It’s easier now, isn’t it?”

“What is?”

“In the dark,” Kaoru explained, “It’s easier for you to talk in the dark.”

Kenshin shrugged, knowing she could make out the outline of his body.

“Why are you always so cold?”

“Why do you want to know all of this so suddenly?”

Kaoru shrugged.  “Is it to stop the bloodlust? Keep the insanity away?”

“I thought you could just label me a cold-hearted monster and leave it at that.”

“I’ll never understand you,” Kaoru sighed, twirling a strand of her hair.

“As I have repeatedly told you.”

“But,” she continued, looking up to meet his golden eyes in the semi-darkness, “Having meditated on Genji’s emotions and memories, I can appreciate your struggle.”

Kenshin arched a dark eyebrow at her. Kaoru crawled towards the base of his armchair, holding his eyes with her own. He stared down at her, letting his mask of impassiveness drop onto his face as she sat on the floor right beside his leg.

“Just for tonight,” Kaoru whispered up at him, “Just for tonight, let me sympathize with your struggle.”

She reached up and turned one his hands over. She traced her soft fingertips over his palm, pressing down slightly on the calluses caused by the sword.

“Tomorrow,” she murmured, “Tomorrow we can be enemies again.”

Kaoru’s fingers gently left his hand and she turned to face the fireplace, still reclining on one hip beside his leg.

“But for just now,” she sighed, “Let me be a part of your fight for sanity.”

Gently, and very gingerly, Kaoru leaned the side of her head upon Kenshin’s knee. She closed her eyes slowly, letting her last sight for the night be the glowing red embers.

Kenshin lifted his palm up and stared at it. And then he stared down at the girl’s head on his knee. Inhaling deeply, he threaded his fingers through his bangs and rested his forehead on his palm, leaning his elbow on the armrest. Then he also let his eyes drift close, noticing hazily that for the first time in a long while, the stench of blood was not assaulting his mind.

Just before his eyes closed completely, he felt tiny droplets of wetness just where Kaoru’s eyes would be resting on his knee. His mind registered her tears distantly. It also registered an unfamiliar sentiment.

Comfort.

It didn’t matter, he rationalized to himself.

After all, it would be just for one night.