DISCLAIMER: I don't own Inuyasha… but you already knew that.

People Involved

Ch. 4

By Lara Winner

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Inuyasha called me Monday evening. We talked for a little while and for the first time that I can remember it felt awkward.

I'm not sure what I expected but he didn't ask about Kouga and I didn't ask about Itsuki. I know he's heard that I've agreed to go to the prom with Kouga. Wolf-boy hasn't exactly been quiet about it. But Kouga and I are not a couple and I would have told Inuyasha that I accepted if I'd thought he wanted to know.

I'm kind of glad we skipped the issue. Kouga is another story all together.

For as long as Inuyasha's been avoiding me, Kouga's been subtly trying to take his place. It's nothing to make a big deal about, it's just strange. Now Kouga's the one waiting for me by my locker after class, eating lunch with me everyday, and giving me a ride home when Ayumi can't.

I don't really mind the changes… save for the fact that it means Inuyasha hates me. But ever since I've agreed to go to prom with Kouga its gotten worse. Now he tries to hold my hand whenever he can, he surprises me with kisses on the cheek left and right and his newest thing is to tease me by saying I'm his woman.

I am not his woman. I am no one's property.

I know he doesn't mean it seriously, at least I hope he doesn't. If he does he's about to get a very rude awakening. There's one very important thing he needs to learn about me. I make up my own mind about who and what I want.

Inuyasha always said that was my greatest flaw. I'm too stubborn and independent for my own good. And he may have been right. I'll cut my nose to spite my face and in the end I'll make matters worse than they have to be.

I should have confronted Inuyasha when he called the other night. I should have asked him why he couldn't bring himself to be near me anymore. But I didn't. For the sake of showing him that I can do just fine without him I let a perfect chance to fix this mess slip away. And I'm too proud to call him and get brushed off again. I can take a hint the first time it's given.

When did my life become so depressing?

"Kagome?"

I'm jerked out of my thoughts as I realize that Kikyo is standing in the front door looking a bit concerned. She offers me a slight smile. "Are you going to sit on the swing all day or are you going to get ready. It's quarter to three. You better get stared or you'll never be ready for six."

"I'm coming." I nod listlessly. Now that prom night has finally arrived I can't summon an ounce of enthusiasm about it. It's not going to be the same this year. I almost don't want to go.

Kikyo comes over taking a seat on the swing next to me. "Something's wrong. Want to talk bout it?"

"Not really."

"Then I'll keep you company while you sulk. How does that sound?" she counters, her voice bearing a hint of sarcasm.

"I'm not sulking." It's easier to talk if I look down at my clasped hands. "I'm just confused, hurt and really pissed off."

"Inuyasha?"

I crack a smile. "Good guess."

"It's obvious. Even Mom is beginning to wonder where he's hiding himself lately."

"With his girlfriend." I scowl.

There's no point in skimping on the facts so I tell Kikyo everything that's happened over the last three weeks. She listens thoughtfully as I explain how I feel as best I can. I tell her about Kouga and about Itsuki. I even tell her what happened at the marina.

Kikyo must sense how much this is tearing me up because she reaches over and pats my knee comfortingly. "You know what I think?" she sighs, "I think that you have feelings for Inuyasha. You may even be in love with him."

I gape at her. "But I'm not! I would know if something like that happened."

"Would you?" she asks curiously. "Then tell me how you define love Kagome?"

"I.. I don't… know," I stumble over my words trying to come to terms with her question.

How would I define love?

"I guess it's doing something for somebody because its makes them happy. Maybe being there when they need me. I don't know. I've never been in love so I'm not sure what it's supposed to feel like."

"You're on the right track but love is essentially different for everyone. You must comprehend what it exemplifies for you and apply that to your feelings toward Inuyasha."

"I know I love him. I'm just not 'in love' with him." I say but my voice is lacking the conviction I wanted to put behind it.

My heart is pounding in my chest as something akin to panic fills me. Is she right? Am I falling for him? No. I can't be.

Can I?

"Kagome…" she looks me directly in the eye, "I'd be willing to assume that he has feelings for you too."

At that I laugh. "Yeah right. That's why he's with her."

"I'm serious." She insists. "It sounds to me like both of you are afraid. After all, if your emotions were strictly at a platonic level then why take on a sexual relationship?"

"Because we were horny and stupid."

"Or perhaps you've both come to realize that you love each other and the only complication is that neither of you can admit the truth." With that Kikyo stands and gives my hair a gentle ruffle. "You've got plenty of time to figure this out later. Right now you need to get ready."

She holds the front door open for me as numbly follow her into the house. I'm not sure if our conversation has done more harm than good. I'm not sure what to think at all because right now I have a queasiness in my stomach that feels like the ground has just fallen out from beneath my feet.

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I managed to be ready for six. I even suffered through the pictures and the fussing my mother made over how beautiful I was in my red dress with my hair curled and my face caked with make-up. Then she gushed at how handsome Kouga looked in his tux. He was a good sport about the whole scene and I was impressed at how easily he charmed my mother right off her feet.

Granted Kouga was absolutely adorable in his tuxedo and I was getting a little flushed every time he'd flash his sexy smile at me.

The plans were already set. The after party is at Rin's house since her parents out of town. My Mom knows that I'm be spending the night at Sango's. And I've promised myself that I won't get piss ass drunk this year and end up sleeping in Sango's bathroom. That wasn't very fun.

We took Kouga's car instead of riding with the others in the limo. That was fine by me. It's going to be bad enough being in the same room with Inuyasha and Kouga. It would have been pure misery if I'd had to sit in the same vehicle with them too.

The prom was held at the Ambassador Hotel, conveniently all the way across town from where I live. This was so much better than having it in the gym like last year. The ballroom was simply beautiful and I felt the first flutters of excitement build inside of me when Kouga led me inside.

As I figured it would happen, with the luck I seem to be having lately, Sango had reserved Kouga and I a spot the table she snagged. And of course sitting right across from me is Inuyasha and Itsuki. Thankfully Ayumi and Sango kept the conversation going because having Inuyasha stare at me with his deadpan expression was making me the slightest bit uneasy.

I'm not really much of a dancer but I let Kouga take me out on the dance floor more times than I could count just to escape those intense golden eyes. But even then I couldn't shake the feeling that they were following my every move.

It was nearing the time to leave when I found myself alone at the table with Inuyasha. Itsuki was off talking with some friends. I'm not sure where Kouga disappeared to, but with everyone else on the dance floor that left Inuyasha with me.

I offered him a small smile. "Having fun?"

"Sure." He shrugged. "You?"

"Yeah. It's nice."

That awkward silence came creeping back and I had to fight the urge to squirm in my seat. I couldn't look at him so I settled for admiring the water ring left on the tablecloth by someone's glass of soda.

"You look really beautiful tonight."

His compliment caught me off guard and I blushed. "Thanks."

But this polite chitchat was bullshit. It shouldn't have been like this between us. It's wasn't right. This is the guy I used to talk to for hours about absolutely nothing. Now we can't find two words to say without damn near choking on them. I was fed up.

"Inuyasha," I forced myself to look him in the eye so he would know how serious I was. "Can you come by my house tomorrow. I really need to talk to you."

He knew why I asked. He didn't need me to spell it out. "Yeah. Call me when you get home from Sango's."

Something in the way he said "Sango's" sounded snide and I realized why a moment later when Kouga wrapped his arms around me from behind, placing a kiss to my neck. Inuyasha stiffened but he kept his mouth shut and looked away.

It wasn't long after that when the last song was over and it was time to take the party elsewhere. Everyone agreed to meet at Rin's house but I knew something was up when Kouga climbed in behind the driver's seat with an evil smirk plastered across his face.

Now I'm not familiar with how to get Rin's house considering I've never been to the place before but it's quite obvious when he turns in the opposite direction of the cars in front of us that he has another destination in mind.

"Uh… where are we going?" I ask.

"For a ride."

"A ride where?"

"You'll see."

I hate playing guessing games so it's a good thing that we don't have far to go. There is only one reason Kouga would take me to Enoki Park on a Saturday night right after prom. It's so obvious that I have to tease him.

"This isn't very original."

He kills the engine and turns to face me, his eyes narrowed. "I'm not going for originality. I'm going for effectiveness. Here we're guaranteed to be alone."

"But if you're too predictable that's boring." I counter.

"Ahh… but the originality comes later." He laughs as he leans in closer to kiss me. He pauses, giving me the option to say no but the words are stuck in my throat. All I can do is close my eyes and ride the feeling as he seals his mouth to mine.

I'd be lying is I said that I wasn't attracted to Kouga. I'd also be lying if I said I didn't like the feel of his lips against mine. I know I should probably stop him but a part of me doesn't want to. I want to feel wanted. I want to feel loved…

Loved?

I want to enjoy the kiss. I don't want to think about reason and what's right or wrong. But I don't have that option because the word love brings up the conversation I had with Kikyo earlier this afternoon.

Why do I associate sex with love? They are not the same things. I've always understood that. Hell, I've told myself that thousands of times. So why is my heart suddenly telling me this is wrong?

Does this mean that I don't love Kouga? Probably, but I've known that all along. I like him but I'm not ready to have sex with him. Not now, maybe not ever.

Still that leaves me with another all too important question.

Do I love Inuyasha?

Is that why I never had reservations about giving my virginity to him? Is that why I'm associating sex with love? Because I love him?

No. I can't let myself love Inuyasha. He hurt me. He's still hurting me. Every time I see him with Itsuki I want to curl up into a ball and die. I hate him for it. I don't want to love him.

But I don't think I have a choice.

Reluctantly I push at Kouga's shoulders. He leans back, frowning. "What's wrong."

"Why are we doing this?" I ask breathlessly.

He smirks. "Why not?"

"We need to stop before this goes to far."

"Damn. I knew I should have gotten you drunk."

My jaw drops. "What!"

Seeing that I took him seriously, he rolls his eyes. "Geez. I was only joking. Relax."

He tries to kiss me again but I can't give in to it. It wouldn't be fair to get more people involved in the mess Inuyasha and I have created. I can't even say that I'm not doing this out of spite. I don't know. I'm not sure of anything anymore. I just need some space.

"Kouga stop."

There must have been something in my voice that hinted at fear or nervousness, I'm not sure, but he backed off immediately. "Okay okay… see I stopped."

He sits back in the driver's seat, facing forward and taking a deep breath. I'm, not afraid of him. I know he'd never do anything to hurt me. He'd certainly never force himself on me. And I wasn't trying to lead him on. Gods help me I do like him. I could even love him, I know I could. But what can I do? Inuyasha made his move first.

"Maybe it's a good thing I brought you out here anyway." He says after a moment. "Now I can ask you some things that I've been trying to figure out for a while now."

I don't like the sound of this. I have the feeling I already know what he's going to ask.

He faces me again, composure back along with his easy smile. "How do you feel about me? Please be honest. I need to know."

Okay, not the dreaded question but close enough.

"I like you." I answer softly, fiddling the seat belt across my lap.

"But?"

I sigh. "But I don't think I can give you what you want. There are reasons why I can't give us a chance."

"There only one thing holding you back Kagome. It's him, isn't it?"

Oh gods…

The venom in his voice is enough to tell me he's hit the nail right on the head. There's no defense I can use when he knows the truth. So I bow my head and nod.

"I know you've slept with him. There's been times I could smell him on you." he confesses in a pained whisper. "And I've seen how you look at him. I knew all along. I just thought that if you gave me a chance I could make you see…"

The tears are scalding as the well up in my eyes. I don't want to hear all of this. I don't want to know how much I've hurt him.

But I have to ask. I need to know. "See what?"

"That I'd never use you like that."

Kouga has just said the words that have been hovering over my heart for so long. I close my as tightly as I can but the truth is still hanging between us.

"Inuyasha doesn't deserve you. Maybe I don't either, but with all you've got to offer any guy would be an idiot to give that away. And I'm not just saying this shit. I mean it. You're too beautiful and smart to waste your time with that dumb mother fucker!"

"Kouga!"

"Well its true." He says defensively. "Everybody knows Itsuki's reputation. She a dirty slut. If that stupid mutt has any brain cells that work then why the fuck is with her when he has you? Tell me please, because I don't see how its physically possible for him to have his head that far up his ass!"

I can't help but give a teary laugh. He's doing it again. He's still trying to make me feel better, even after I sort of dumped him. I look up but all I can manage is a wobbly smile. I feel like I'm about to start sobbing any second.

"Don't cry sweetheart. We're going to go to Rin's and you're going to smile and have a great time and we're going to make sure that son of a bitch knows exactly what he's missing."

Kouga means well but I know I'm not up for that. I can't pull it off, not after this. I already feel like shit for hurting Kouga. I can't take deliberately angering Inuyasha too.

"Actually… can you take me home? I'm not going to be good company for you tonight. You should go and have a good time instead of baby-sitting me."

"Kagome?"

"Please. Just bring me home." I plead, loosing the battle to keep my voice steady.

For once Kouga doesn't say anything, he just starts the car and begins to drive. Outside the window the changing scenery helps give me something to focus on and it allows me to pull myself together. I'm due to curl up in my bed tonight and have a good cry but at least I can hold my own now till I get home.

The car is stopped at a red light when he reaches over and takes my hand in his. I look up and he grins. "We're cool right?"

I smile too. "Yeah we're cool."

And that's when it happened.

Kouga was still looking at me when the light turned green. He didn't see the truck on the left speeding up to run the red light. If he had he would have slammed on the brakes. Instead I saw it at the last second. But there was no time to scream, no time for anything. All I could see were bright headlights coming right at us and then there was an explosion of metal and glass engulfing us. A second later everything went dark.

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A.N. – Don't hate me! I'm sorry to give you such an evil cliffy but that's what my muses demanded I do. There are two more chapters though. That should be promising. Of course they could always be in Inu's pov...