DISCLAIMER: I don't own Inuyasha… but you already knew
that.
People Involved
Ch. 3
By Lara Winner
............................
The next day Inuyasha called me bright and early to
see if I was okay. I told him everything, that Kikyo had figured it out and I
was going to see her doctor. He wasn't too thrilled about her knowing the
situation but what's done was done. She promised to keep quiet about it and all
I could do was trust she'd keep her word.
After that the days seemed to fly by and before I knew
it another month had come and gone so swiftly it left my head spinning.
I've finally decided to sit out a year before I start
college. My Mom isn't too happy about my choice. She thinks I'll lose the
motivation to go if I don't do it right away. But I've done some serious
thinking and taking a look at all the work and effort my sister is putting in
to her grades I can honestly say I'm not that dedicated right now. I need a bit
of a breather to get my priorities straight.
It's already mid April and the talk of prom is the
newest buzz around school. The prom committee is driving the senior class
insane with all their polls and questionnaires. I tend to avoid them whenever
possible but Ayumi is one of my friends and she's on the committee too. Since
we're friends she spares me for the most part but even she has her ways of
getting me to answer those silly questions.
I'm starting to sound like Inuyasha, complaining about
the most trivial things that are ridiculously unimportant. I really don't care
about prom. I'll go and I'll have fun but in my opinion it's not really worth
all the hype. I like the after party better.
Mental note… Don't not match Ginta shot for shot. I
will loose and Inuyasha will get pissed.
Inuyasha…
I've got to stop this. He's always in my thoughts
these days. I mean I do see him everyday and all, but I'm beginning to notice
how I'm thinking about him all the time. Its almost like everything I do in the
back of my mind I'm asking what would he say about this or what would he do
about that. I'm not sure I like this.
This is another one of those sneaky little changes I
was talking about. And there are a lot more but some are more obvious than
others.
Like Friday at lunch I caught myself watching him talk
to Itsuki from across the quad. I'd noticed they'd been talking a lot the last
week or so. At first I just stared, observing his body language. Then I started
to get annoyed when she began to flirt with him, flipping her brown hair and
batting her blue eyes. That's when I came back to reality and realized exactly
what I was doing. It's had me on edge ever since.
First of all Itsuki is his ex and what they do is none
of my business unless he chooses to confide in me about it. Secondly, I'm not
Inuyasha's girlfriend so I have no right to get upset if he's interested in
someone else. And third, why the hell do I care anyway?
At first I tried to reason that I was only worried. She
made an ass out him once and I didn't want her to do it again. But I'm not a
good liar and I see no point in lying to myself. So I laid my cards on the
table and admitted that I was a little jealous.
I tried to take it deeper and figure out why I was
jealous but I couldn't. At that point things stopped making sense. Suddenly I'm
thinking that there might be the slightest possibility that I could like
Inuyasha in 'that' way and my brain goes haywire. I was bombarded with
conflicting emotions that I couldn't focus on long enough to examine.
I guess I want someone to tell me what I should feel. But
nobody can do that but me and I'm not ready to deal with this.
So when will I be?
This is the crap I'm thinking about when I should be
doing my calculus homework. The book is sitting in front of me and I see the
numbers but they're not making a connection in my head. My mind keeps wandering
into forbidden territory.
I glance at the clock. It's eleven thirty Tuesday
night. He's not going to call.
It's been three days since I've been to his house. I
try not to feel disappointed. Instead I put my books away and crawl into my
bed, clothes and all. I'll get Sango to let me copy her homework in the
morning. Right now what I need is a good nights sleep. I'll feel better
tomorrow.
..............................
I thought I'd feel better today? What a joke.
The latest rumor floating around school is that
Inuyasha and Itsuki are back together again. At first I thought someone had
gotten the information wrong. They couldn't be together. If it were true
Inuyasha would have told me. But when Sango cornered me at my locker before
second period asking for details on why they made up, I realized that it was
true.
All through my morning classes I steamed. How could he
not tell me? I thought we were still friends. But I guess we're not because
suddenly I'm beginning to realize why I've barely seen him since Sunday. He's
been with Itsuki the whole time.
I thought I would have been jealous, and I was a
little, but it wasn't jealousy that had me sick to my stomach. It was hurt. I
was the last one to know. It seemed everybody knew they were back together but
me and I'm supposed to be his best friend.
This is what I was afraid of. Now that we've had sex
Inuyasha is going to push me away. I'm going to become another fuck up in his
life and our friendship will be over.
As much as the idea was killing me inside, it also
made me angry.
At lunch I didn't go to our usual spot in the quad. Instead
I went to the library and wrote a letter to him in my notebook. I wasn't
planning on giving it to him but it made me feel better to get out all my
thoughts and feelings on paper. By the time lunch was over I had calmed down
considerably.
But that didn't mean I wasn't angry. I passed
Inuyasha's locker on my way to my next class but I didn't look in his
direction. I heard him call my name but I kept on walking, ignoring him. I had
the feeling that if he tried to talk to me right now I'd only end up pummeling
him with my book bag and send him to the nurse's office.
After another three classes and five laps around the
football field in PE, my anger was spent. All that was left was the hurt at
being completely pushed aside when I had a right to know that he wanted to be
with Itsuki again.
The sex was nice but I can live without it. It was
never important. But Inuyasha means so much to me that I can't bare the thought
of loosing him. I love him. It's not romantic love. This is different than
that. In a way it's deeper.
We have to talk about this. That's why I'm not really
surprised when he's waiting for me at my locker as soon as class lets out. Neither
of us says anything till we reach his car.
He motions for me to get in. "I'll give you a
ride home."
I hesitate. "It's better if I walk."
"I really don't want to get into this in the
fucking parking lot Kagome. Get in!"
He's not in a good mood and I don't want to argue with
him if I don't have to. But right now I don't want to be alone with him either.
Or maybe I just don't want to hear about her.
I make myself as comfortable as I can in the passenger
seat but the tension inside of me has my muscles too taught to relax. He
notices this just like he notices everything. I reach over and lower radio
giving him permission to start talking anytime.
It doesn't take long for me to realize that he's not
driving to my house. He drives to the marina instead. He parks the car facing
the harbor so we can watch the boats come in. It's a pretty view with the way
the afternoon sun is reflecting on the water. He kills the engine and we sit in
silence until I can't take it anymore.
"Shouldn't you be at the youth center right
now?"
The question is inane but it lets him know that I want
an explanation and I'm dying hear exactly what he has to say. He rakes a hand
through his tousled sliver bangs and sighs. "If I skip Haru will cover for
me. Why is that a big deal?"
"It's not. I was just wondering." I reply
cooly.
"Drop the attitude Kagome. I already know you're
pissed off. You've been avoiding me all fucking day." he snaps.
I laugh bitterly. "That's funny, I thought it was
the other way around."
"Son of a bitch!" he yells, slamming his
fist against the steering wheel. His unexpected display of temper makes me
flinch but I won't dare look at him as he turns to face me, his eyes blazing. "I
was going to explain everything to you but Itsuki opened her fat trap to half
the goddamn school before I could fucking say anything! That's not my
fault."
No. He's not playing the innocent one here…
"If you knew you wanted to start seeing her again
why the hell couldn't you tell me right away? This didn't happen over night. I
have eyes. I've seen the way you've been acting around each other lately. I
barely saw you all weekend. Don't you think I know where you were? You've had
plenty of time to tell me and instead I'm the last one to know. Thanks a
lot."
He looks away guiltily but he's not letting go of his
anger, he's too proud to back down yet. "We don't have a relationship you
know. We can do whatever the fuck we want with whoever we want."
"You're right." I agree, seething. "But
that's not the point. I'm not angry because you're with her I'm angry because
we're supposed to be friends. Before we started messing around I would have
been the first to know about you guys. How do you think that makes me feel? If
positions were reversed I wouldn't let you hear it from everyone else first. How
would you like it if I started dating Kouga? What if I didn't tell you about
it? I think you'd be pissed off too."
Inuyasha knows I'm right. He gripping the steering
wheel so tightly that his knuckles are white and I can almost hear it groaning
under the pressure.
"Fuck it!" he hisses. "You want be with
that jackass go right ahead. Go fuck him and see how long it takes for word to
get all around the school. Hey who knows, maybe you did already. Maybe that's
why he's panting after you so bad!"
Now that stung.
I turn to him, wide-eyed. I can't believe he said
that. He knows I've never been with anyone else. How dare he…
"Look asshole, I don't what rock you crawled out
from under but you started this shit. You wanted sex that night and you know
damn well that I've never been with anyone besides you. Now I'm sorry if that
makes me slut but, just so you know, if it had been anyone else but you I would
have said no. As it is I'm sorry I didn't. I really am. That was the biggest
mistake I've ever made."
Once it was said the anger inside of me deflated. I
didn't mean it anymore than he meant what he said. I said it to hurt him and it
must have because he winced. I didn't want it to be like this. There is so much
distance between us right now that I feel sick.
"I knew this would happen. I knew it." I
whisper softly before opening the door and stepping from the car.
We both need to calm down. As long as he's angry he'll
only rub off on me and we'll never get anywhere. Wrapping my arms about my
chest, I walk toward the closest pier and take a deep breath. The salty air is
heaven. I've always loved the ocean.
The minutes tick by and I let my mind go still. I
don't want to think so I immerse myself in my surroundings. I watch the birds
circling in the air and let their cries blend in with the sounds coming from
the port. It's peaceful and for a moment I'm able separate myself from the way
my life is falling apart.
But the pain comes rushing back with suffocating
momentum when I hear his door open. He comes to stand by my side and when I
don't step away he tentatively drapes his arm around my shoulder.
"I could've left you here." He tries to joke
but it comes out sounding pretty pathetic.
It's no more pathetic then the way my voice cracks
from unshed tears as I lean into him. "I'd like to think you wouldn't do
that to me."
He shrugs. "I'm a bastard."
"Stop it please. I don't want to fight
anymore." I plead, blinking at the tears that are filling my eyes.
"Damn it Kagome, don't start crying."
"I can't help it. I feel like I'm loosing
you?" I sniff.
Inuyasha puts his arms around me in a loose hug. His
breath puffs against my cheek as he scoffs, "Feh. It takes more than one
stupid fight to get rid of me. You oughtta know that by now."
I look up at him to find him giving me his most
charming smirk. Gently, he reaches up to wipe the tears away, mindful of his
claws, as he winks. "You better stop crying before your face gets all
puffy and starts to look like a red balloon."
I smile reluctantly as leans his forehead against
mine. I'm happy to stand there with him like that, just the two of us. It feels
good to have the contact after the roller coaster ride my emotions have taken
this afternoon. I know nothings is solved and there is still so much up in the
air but he's here now and I want to hold on to that for as long as possible.
"You okay?" he asks quietly.
"Yeah."
With our heads together his lips are a breath away
from mine. His amber eyes are glowing with too many emotions to name and I
can't resist the pull that lies between us. With the lightest touch our lips
meet and I curl my fingers into his shirt pulling him closer.
It's all the invitation he needs. He teeth nip at my
lower lip begging for an opening and I part them eagerly. My breath catches as
his tongue sweeps into my mouth. His hands tighten on my waist and that
familiar heat comes seeping into my blood. I want him…
But reason hasn't left me completely and, by the
hardest, I force myself to pull away. We can't do this. Not if he's back with
Itsuki.
He takes a step away, his cheeks pink and his
breathing heavy. "Sorry. I shouldn't have done that."
"Its okay. Don't worry about it." I say
equally as flustered. "It's getting late. You better take me home."
Through the ride back my house neither of us are
talking. It's not uncomfortable but I know he's thinking about the kiss. That's
the first time we've ever kissed when we weren't removing clothing at the same
time. I'm not sure why it happened.
He gives me a half-hearted smile when I tell him good
bye. I tweak his ear to show him that every things okay. But as I watch him
pull off I know that I'm being optimistic. Something tells me things will get
much worse before they get better.
...............................
"Kagome did you and Inuyasha have a fight or
something?" Sango asks as she takes another sip of her milkshake.
Swallowing the huge bite I'd taken of my ice cream
sunday, I roll my eyes. "You know how he is. Now that he's all lovey dovey
with Itsuki he forgets he as other friends."
She gives me a skeptical look. "There's more to
it than that. I haven't seen you two together in forever."
She's right. I haven't really talked to Inuyasha in
over two weeks, not since our little chat at the marina. We pass each other in
the halls at school and we wave. He sits with Itsuki at lunch now. He hasn't
called me once since that night. I've called him a few times but when we talk
he's in a rush to get off the phone. I've gotten the message. He doesn't want
to have anything to do with me.
Every time I think about it the pain is so bad that I
want to cry. But I'm not going to burst into tears in front of Sango and
especially not right in the middle of our favortite fast food
place on a sunny Saturday afternoon.
I give her a really huge fake smile and stuff my mouth
with more ice cream so I can't say anything.
She's not buying it. "If something did happen you
can always talk to me about it."
"Nothing happened. He's got better things to do
with his time and besides, you know how I hate being the third wheel." I
insist.
"Kagome, are you sure?"
I nod a little too enthusiastically. "Yup. He's
being a jerk as usual. That's all."
I look down at my half-finished sunday but I no longer
have an appetite. There's a lump of unshed tears that are wedged in my throat
and it almost feels like it's choking me. I hate this. I want things to go back
to the way they were before we messed everything up. I said I'd never regret
having sex with Inuyasha but now I do.
Sango noisily slurps down the last of her shake but
her mouth twists into a wide smile as clawed hands suddenly settle on my
shoulders from behind. By body jerks in complete surprise and my heart leaps
traitorously as I think for a second that it's Inuyasha. But when I turn my
head I'm staring into the most dazzling turquoise eyes.
"Hey Kagome."
"Hey Kouga." I smile feeling my spirits
lighten a bit. "Wanna sit with us?"
"Don't mind if I do." He grins, straddling
the chair beside me and resting his arms as across the back. "What are two
sexy girls like you doing by yourselves?"
Sango glances at her watch. "My my look at
the time. I really need to get a move on." She gives me a meaningful look
as she collects her purse. "I've got to get my shoes polished. I'll see
you guys later."
Sango
scampers off leaving the perfect little set up for Kouga and I. He watches her
walk away, frowning. "She does realize she's wearing sneakers,
right?"
I turn to
look at him wondering if he really bought her lame excuse but his boyish grin
lets me know he's only teasing.
"Even I
could do better than that," he brags, "but it was original."
"She
left us. I think we should be insulted." I chuckle.
His blue eyes
twinkle. "I'm not. I get some quality time with you. I'd say I faired out pretty
good in this deal."
I can't help
but blush. He so sweet and he always says the right thing. I know he's only
trying to impress me right now but still, I like the attention. It feels good
to be treated like I'm something special. I need it now that Inuyasha's thrown
me away.
"You're
a shameless flirt." I grin.
"Or
maybe I'm about to ask you to go to the prom with me and I really want you to
say yes."
"Kouga…"
"I know
you've turned me down every other time I've asked you out but I figure if I'm
persistent enough then one of these times you have to say yes. So if you say no
to prom I'm still going to ask you again and again and again… So why don't you
make it easy on both of us and go with me? Please?"
"That's
your game plan, to wear me down?" I laugh.
He reaches
over and grasps my hand, lifting it to his lips. "If I have to."
I giggle and
pull my hand away, more than a little embarrassed.
"What do you say Kagome?" his smile turns
downright sinful. "Come on. You know you want to."
I don't have a date. Sango will be with Miroku,
Inuyasha will be with Itsuki, and Ayumi will be with Houjo… If I decline then
I'll be tagging along with the others and I hate tagging along. But if I go
with Kouga I might actually have a good time.
Why am I saying no?
"Well…" I look down, trying not to smile. "I
guess I could go to the prom with you."
He blinks. Then slowly the smile on his face widens to
where I think it's going to split it cheeks, it so big. "Really? You mean
it?"
"Yeah, I'll go with you."
"I must be the luckiest guy in the world." He
says excitedly as he leans over and plants a firm kiss on my lips.
It wasn't long or passionate but I blushed none the
less. Stunned, I brought my fingers to my lips. "Kouga?"
He only smiles, ignoring my shock. "Since Sango
ditched you how bout I give ride home, sweetheart?"
I nod and let him take my hand, pulling me to my feet.
He leads me outside to the parking lot and doesn't let go until we
reach his car. For the moment I'm feeling content.
Well I was, until I notice a certain golden eyed
hanyou standing across the street watching us.
..............................
A.N. – Thank you for all the wonderful feedback. This
story is already plotted out so there are only three chapters left. With
all the emotional ups and downs this story would be way too depressing if I
dragged it out. So, jealousy has now become a factor and Kagome is going to get
closer to Kouga. There are so many directions I could take this as the
plot thickens. Next up: Prom night. Enjoy!