Disclaimer: Rurouni Kenshin is the creation of Nobuhiro Watsuki, with the manga and anime rights belonging to Jump Comics and Sony Entertainment, respectively. FF is non-profit, meant for entertainment only.

Please send no flames, I’m sensitive. For all other comments 0_o you may contact me at kaoru_koishii@yahoo.com

Chapter One

*************

Kaoru sat in the yard of her dojo, crying. Today was the last day of the full moon. It had also been the third year anniversary to Kenshin’s stay here at the dojo. It was a date she wouldn’t soon forget. Tonight, he’d made it very clear where she stood with him. Well as clear as the rurouni can. Tripping over his words in order to set her down gently. She had always hoped that maybe with time she could win his heart. But then after the thing with Yukshiro, Enishi she didn’t think she had to. As hard as it had been, he’d proven he’d loved her. She been so sure of his affection, especially after they told her how he’d acted after her supposed death.

“Why?” She cried out into the night.

“Why do things have to be like this?” She held a small blanket to her face. Muffling the sounds of her cries.

“I thought you loved me.” She pleaded at the moon. Hoping what he’d said had been a mistake on her part. It must be his guilt. It has to be. If only there was a way to free him off that. To make him let go. “Oh, how I wish . . . .”

What is it she wished? For him to love her? Yes, of course but wishing for that would be selfish of her.

So what is it she wished for? For him to be happy. Yes, but he would never be happy as long as he carried the sins. Those sins burned his heart and his mind. Consuming him.

So what is it she wished for?

“Was there ever a time when you were happy Kenshin?” She whispered. The cool night air drifting into the yard.

He must have been happy with his wife. But in the end that brought pain for him too. The worst kind.

He was happy with Hiko. Though at that young age he was restless.

The Only time she could think of, or piece together would be when he was around the age of fifteen. Exactly at fifteen. It had been just before Tomoe and a while after Hiko. He was doing something he believed in. That made him perhaps not happy but content. He was protecting all he could with the wield of his sword. Bringing hope to the defenseless or at least it would later on.

Kaoru turned her tear stained face to the heavens, noting the inky blue color surrounding it, trying to fill it. “I wish I could have met you then, when your mind was at ease.” She choked out another sob she was able to muffle with her blanket. “Oh how I wish it were so.” She doubled over into a fetal position crying till she felt too drained to do anything else. The moon was just starting to descend as she got up, slowly. Feeling a big headache coming on. She dusted herself and slowly made her way into the house back to her room.

‘Hopefully Kenshin will only think I went to the bathroom this early in the morning,’ she thought. Her eyelids were so heavy. There was room for nothing more than sleep.

: : : : : : : : : : : : :

He was running through the streets. Chasing someone. He couldn’t tell who it was only that they were eluding him. He ran faster but it didn’t seem to make a difference. Why couldn’t he catch up? He paused in the middle of the street, closing his eyes and stretching his senses. He could feel no one. He opened his eyes again and he could see the shadow, lingering up ahead. Just standing there waiting for him to take chase again.

He took chase and so did the shadow. “Oi!” He yelled.

The shadow made no move of acknowledgement but somehow he knew the shadow heard. “Oi.” He yelled again.

How can anyone not stop when they hear you calling them?

“Stop!” He yelled and this time the shadow’s step faltered as it ran ahead. He was becoming angry. “Stop!” He yelled for the last time. His deep tone carried the anger he felt. He gripped his katana and blurred for a moment. His speed had increased to an unbelievable point. He pulled out his sword and not being able to see in the dense fog, he swung out blindly. He heard a thump. The fog had gotten thicker. He reached down and felt a shoulder.

“Oi!” His voice had lost all edge. All feeling. He wanted answers and he wanted them now.

: : : : : : : : : : : : :

“Kenshin can you hear me.” Kaoru said as she shook him a little. She’d been calling out to him for a while but he hadn’t woken up.

“Kenshin. Please wake up.” She shook him a bit harder. He was scarring her. Her eyes started watering again. He couldn’t have died in his sleep. He just couldn’t have.

“Kenshin.” She cried, almost yelled into his face. She felt his hands moving and quickly her eyes turned to his face.

They slowly opened to reveal deep purple eyes. He blinked slowly in confusion. He’d been asleep. How was that possible? He blinked again and things came into focus.

“Where am I?” He commanded.

Kaoru felt the air grow thin and her body heavy. Her eyes rolled back as she started to fall.

The confused man caught her before she fell to the floor. He placed her onto the futon he’d occupied a moment ago.

He took notice of the room and the atmosphere. Everything was quiet. Peaceful.

Was he no longer in Kyoto? What had happened the night before?

He looked down at the petite woman on the futon. She would know. She would tell him. He peered down at her carefully. He hadn’t noticed she was in a yukata till this very moment. He felt a bit strange, to be looking at her. So without a thought he reached for the blankets and covered her up. No need for a distraction when he started interrogating her.

He sat to her side. With closed eyes, waiting.

Kaoru’s eyes were slow to open. What a nightmare. She looked up to see the familiar face. “Kenshin,” she called out. “I had a nightmare. It was silly of course but it seemed so real.” Her eyes focused on his face as he revealed his eyes.

She blinked at the look in them. They were guarded. She opened her mouth to speak.

“Where am I?” He asked cutting her off.

Kaoru covered her face with her hands. “This isn’t real. I’m dreaming. I’m dreaming.” She moved her hand to peer at his face. He didn’t seem amused.

“Tell me where I am?” He asked, his tone was strong.

“Kenshin.” She cried as she sat up. “Kami.” She said gripping her head before opening her eyes and looking at him again. She studied his features for a moment before she spoke again. He kept saying I not sessha, but I.

“I can’t believe this,” she choked.

He grabbed her wrists and moved them away fro her face. “Tell me,” he growled.

Kaoru was choked to say the least. “You’re not him anymore.” She cried as she fought to cover her face again.

Her sobs were getting to him. She sounded so heartbroken. What is wrong with me? He thought for a moment. He separated her hands and brought them out at her sides. “Answer me.”

“You’re in Tokyo, Kenshin.” She said as she sniffled.

He blinked in confusion.

“How do you know who I am?” The question brought out another tearful sob from her.

“We met three years ago. You’ve been living with me ever since.” She tried explaining.

Three years, what the hell happened to me? “What do you know about me?” He asked.

She whimpered.

And he shook her. “Himura Kenshin. Master of the Hiten Mitsurugi Ryu. Once known as the hitokiri battoussai.” She sobbed and continued. “Currently a rurouni and living in the Kamiya dojo.” She hiccupped at the end.

“Rurouni,” he repeated. He noted it increased the silent tears streaming down her face. “How long?”

“Over ten years.” She said.

He threw her to the side, back onto the futon. “You LIE!” He accused. He searched around for his weapon. He wouldn’t kill her but he’d scare her into telling him the truth.

“Kenshin” She choked. “How old do you think you are?”

His eyes narrowed. “That isn’t your business.” He snapped.

She wiped at her eyes. “Kenshin you’re 31.”

His mouth dropped slightly. She was crazy. His eyes softened for a moment. She would be of no use. No point in scarring her, then.

“Please, look in the mirror.” She urged.

He shook his head. “I am 15.” He stated.

Kaoru felt the world give under her again. No, she thought. This can’t be my fault. “Will you allow me to get you a mirror?” She asked.

“What will that prove?” He asked. The annoyance back in his tone.

“Everything.” She said rising to her feet. She noted he stood up as well and followed her into her room. She pulled out the mirror and handed it to him face down.

He took it and turned it over. He looked into it and blinked. He openly frowned and blinked again. His hand went to the scar on his cheek. It had not been there when he went to sleep. Small wrinkles around his eyes confirmed him to be older than fifteen.

He handed her back the mirror. “What happened?”

She wiped at the insistent tears streaming down her face. “You did all you could for the Ishin shishi. After you helped win the battle for them. At the age of eighteen you disappeared. You became a rurouni and wandered for over ten years. You and I met three years back in the streets of Tokyo. Someone was going around killing people, he claimed to be the Hitokiri Battoussai and he said he was using the Kamiya Kasshin Ryu to do it. So I set off to capture him. I couldn’t let him smear the name of my school like that. So in my attempt to capture him I met you. I miss took you for the Battoussai. But you told me you were nothing more than a rurouni. You showed me your sakabatou, which has the edge on the reverse side. I lectured you on carrying a sword during the Meiji era. I was doing that when I heard the whistles of the police. I ran off to see a masked man killing off the policemen. I told him to stop. I charged him with my shinai and he cut it with his sword. He was about to strike me when you intercepted. You carried me off before he killed me. He only cut my arm, luckily. Still I believe I fainted.” She gave a watery smile in remembrance. “I was grateful to you. Someone who moved as fast as you did could only have been a warrior at some point. I was grateful to you so I asked you to stay.”

“Where is the sakabatou?” He asked interrupting her.

“In the other room.” She said.

He got up and in less than a minute he was back, carrying it. Kaoru looked at it like a foreign object. The sakabatou had never seemed deadly before. Probably because now it was been held by the hitokiri battoussai.

*************

The battoussai sat at the table waiting for the woman to return. She had finished her story on how they met and what had happened in the last three years. But there were things that she didn’t say. He could tell. It wasn’t that she was lying just refusing to go include certain facts. Through out the story she had failed to mention her name. He knew she was a Kamiya but what was her first name.

Kaoru brought him tea and some rice balls to eat while he finished his questions. As long as she held his answers he wouldn’t leave. She placed the food in front of him and sat to his left like she always did. She served his tea and then herself.

“How old are you?” He asked after he took a drink of his tea.

Her mouth opened and her face grew hot. He noticed but didn’t say anything. “I’m twenty now.” She answered him.

He peered at her with an unreadable expression. She was very pretty. Someone like her should have been married by now. He noticed she bowed her head down in embarrassment. From what she said every time an enemy resurfaced, she was the first one kidnapped. Meaning she held value . . . .

. . . . to him.

The battoussai put down his cup almost spilling it in the process as he ran out of the house and into the yard.

Kaoru sat wide eyed for a moment before she followed him out. He couldn’t leave.

“KAoru!”

She ran out to find the Battoussai, his sword drawn to Yahiko’s neck.

 “NO!” She screamed running over to them. Trying to separate them. “He lives here too. He’s my student.” She cried pleadingly. Pulling at his hands.

The battoussai let go reluctantly. He’d hesitated at the call of the familiar name. It’s the only reason the boy wasn’t dead. He re-sheathed his sword with a small click. He watched her approach the boy, checking him for injury and then hugging him when she found none. She took a deep sigh before meeting his gaze. While Yahiko stood behind her shaking and pale as sheet. Too frightened and confused by what had just happened.

“Kenshin, you can’t do that. A lot of the people who come by here are our friends.” She said in exasperation giving him a stern look, which melted to hopelessness. “Come on. I want you to finish eating.” She said as she grabbed him and the boy by the hand.

He allowed himself to be pulled in, giving his surrounding a once over. He turned back to her, noting she sparked interest.

Chapter Two

*************

Yahiko sat stiffly across from the stranger. He no longer looked at him rather the man kept his eyes on Kaoru. While she moved around in the kitchen until she sat down next to him again. The man with deep red hair and eerie blue/violet eyes sat there motionless. A stranger because that’s what he was now.

“Here Yahiko, take a drink.” She said serving the steaming liquid into his cup. Yahiko blew on it before he drank it in one shot. He coughed at the end. It was sake.

“It’s to calm your nerves a little,” she said. Yahiko’s eyes turned to hers. Waiting for the explanation she was trying to give him. He noticed her eyes watered and she struggled to keep the tears from falling. “Yahiko,” she said hoarsely. “Ken . . . shin. He can’t remember anything before the age of fifteen.” She finished.

Yahiko stared at her in confusion. That would mean . . . wasn’t he a . . . then. “Hitokiri Battoussai.” Was all that came out of his mouth. He felt his stomach give a lurch forward. How was this even possible? How?

Kenshin’s eyes narrowed at the boy. Did everyone now know who he was? He didn’t like that fact that the information was so widely known. He would have to limit as to who knew what. The Shinsegumi. They would follow him.

“I don’t think he should stay here Kaoru.” Yahiko said.

While Kaoru gasped in response to the statement.

“He’s dangerous. He doesn’t know who you are. He might harm you.” Yahiko said as he watched Kaoru shake her head in denial. “He wouldn’t even know what he’s done until it was too late.” He finished.

“No!” She cried “No matter what happens I am not letting him leave.” She said to Yahiko.

Turning to Kenshin. “You can’t leave. You promised. You promised,” she whimpered. Yahiko stood and embraced her. Muffling her cries of the injustice of it all. He’d promised that as long as she wanted he’d stay. He couldn’t break his promise. He just couldn’t.

The battoussai watched the scene with interest. The boys’ outburst and the girls’ cries. He made no move to comfort her. Even as she pleaded with him that he’d promised. He felt a small twinge some where in his heart at her words. Which confirmed his thoughts that there was a lot she hadn’t said.

Yahiko pulled away from Kaoru. Her teared stained face, it made him want to fix things. In time she had become like a sister to him. And though he’d never said anything. He loved her and wanted to see her happy. Which is why this situation was very hard. He didn’t want the battoussai anywhere near her. It only brought her pain to see him. Plus without his memory he might actually kill her and feel nothing of it until he was the rurouni again. In which case it would be worse then when he was in the Rakuninmura.

“Kenshin, You don’t need to leave.” She said to him. She watched his face for any sort of understanding, for affirmation, for comfort but his face remained a mask.

He nodded in understanding but it was all he did.

“Then you will remain here with me? She asked with pleading eyes.

Kenshin turned his face to the side and she choked back a sob. Yahiko felt his anger bubble to the surface. The battoussai was out of place and he might stay for a while but only for a while.

The battoussai felt the boy’s ki go up. He didn’t remember making any sort of promises. But he felt she told the truth. And so despite his better judgment he would stay.

“Kenshin?” She asked afraid of his answer.

He turned his face to her. “I will not leave.” He said.

Her lip trembled and she nodded getting up. Yahiko helped her up and they walked to the kitchen.

“Will you please go to the Akabeko and get some lunch for us. Also warn Sano. Or he’ll get the same greeting you did this morning,” she said as she began to wash the dishes.

“I don’t think I should leave you alone with him.” Yahiko said a little worried.

She turned to face him with a weak smile. “It’ll be alright Yahiko. Don’t worry.”

Yahiko nodded and left the kitchen. He walked back out to were they had been eating and Kenshin was gone. He wouldn’t break his promise the same day he’d made it so he was sure that the Battoussai would be back.

*************

The battoussai walked back from town. People had greeted him with smiling faces, confused by his appearance no doubt but still smiling faces. So it was true he lived in this town.

The bakumatsu was over.

The Meijii had begun. It was what he’d hoped for but he didn’t like the fact that he didn’t remember any of it. He felt uneasy. Disgruntle even. What the hell had happened? A blow to the head he could understand but you just don’t wake up an not remember. Shit like that didn’t happen. He paused near the river, looking at his reflection. He’d fixed his hair already. He felt . . . angry. But why? Why was there anger?

He turned around quickly when he felt someone behind him. His eyes narrowed when they didn’t see anyone. He felt them though. The anger and the hate had been directed at him. He focused but he couldn’t sense far enough. He fisted his hand and continued his trek to the Kamiya dojo.

Too many people knew about him. His job had been to remain in the shadows and now . . .

He shook his head. He must have told them it would have been the only way they would have know because he hadn’t left anyone alive to point him out. The atmosphere here was troubling. Despite his promise he felt . . . oppressed.

He walked into the dojo, noting the lack of security. ‘Anyone could just come here and kill her,’ he thought as he made his way inside. Not really thinking why he said it only noting it’s importance.

Near the kitchen sitting at the table was the boy, who he recognized but not the others. His eyes narrowed as he came in. He stood by the door feeling out of place as they stared at him.

Kaoru pooped her head out when they had all become quiet. “What’s wrong?” She asked coming into the room. “Ken . . . shin?” She broke off . . . starring at his new cobalt gi. Her eyes were drawn to the high ponytail. She blinked back the emotions threatening to spill out of their confines. “I was worried.” She said. Noticing he didn’t come the rest of the way into the room she walked over to him. Stood in front of him a moment unsure what to do. Still she grabbed his hand and walked him to his spot at the table.

He sat down and ignored the rest much like he did with his other peers.

“So you don’t remember anything at all?”

The battoussai turned his eyes to the older man. He didn’t feel like sharing and so he remained with out answering. His eyes moved away from the old man to the next one. A man with a disgruntle look and wild looking hair. Next was the boy from earlier. His attention turned to the sound of chattering women who emerged out of the kitchen a moment later.

He gave a quick glance to the older women with red lips. But his eyes were still drawn to the smaller of the two. Kaoru Kamiya, her eyes were still puffy. He watched as she brought out their food and then took a seat. The older women served rice while Kaoru served . . . . meat . . . from the smell of it.

“So have you been able to remember anything else Ken-san?” The women with red lips had spoken to him. His frowned at the way she addressed him. His eyes turned to Kaoru to see how she reacted at the way the women spoke to him.

“Do you think he would just sit there if he remembered anything else?” Kaoru snapped at Megumi.

Megumi was taken aback but for only a moment. “A tanuki like you wouldn’t be able to tell if he was sick or just pretending.”

Kaoru fisted her hands together ready to strike the other women. “Kenshin would never do that.” Kaoru grounded out her jaw set. “Kenshin would never,” she said cried out.

He took note of the rise of her ki and gave an inward smile. He tapped her hand and she turned her attention to him. “Do you want me make them leave?” He asked her and their eyes widened.

She shook her head no. He gave them an unappreciative glance and began to eat. Everyone followed suit after that.

Soon after they finished eating and were having tea. He finally addressed the question he’d been trying to make all day. “Who are you?” He asked.

Her eyes had snapped opened and her face turned up to him in a really big hurry. With her mouth slightly open she didn’t know how to answer him. What she assumed she was and what she might actually be were two different things. The others were outside watching the girls play around. While she and Kenshin remained inside. “Kamiya Kaoru.” she mumbled slowly.

“No.” He responded having grown impatient. He watched her cup tremble a bit and so she set it down. “Who are you to me?”

Her mouth moved without words. “I’m . . . I’m . . .your . . .” She was at a loss for words and her eyes teared up. “I’m your friend Ken . . .shin.” She said in a strangled voice.

“I don’t believe you.” He said getting up.

“Kenshin wait.” She said running in front of him to block the door. “Please.” She begged. “What do you want me to say? What ever it is tell me. I‘ll say it just don‘t go.” She cried, not hiding her tears from him anymore.

He was confused by it all. Why did she cry for him? A friend wouldn‘t act the way she did. At least he didn‘t think so. He couldn’t be sure having never had a female friend before. Still there was the fact that she was twenty and not married. She had to be a lying. He pushed her aside and she fell to the floor. Her cries grew louder. He steeled his nerves and continued his walk outside.

“What the . . .?” Sano took a look behind Kenshin and tried to block him off. “The hell do you think you’re doing? What the hell did you do to Jouchan?” He growled.

Kenshin ignored him.

Sano’s hand fisted before he tried to punch him. Kenshin hit him across the face with the side of his sword knocking him back some. Everyone else froze.

Yahiko ran to the front of the gate, shinai in hand. “I can’t let you leave Kenshin. You promised her long ago you wouldn’t leave and you promised her today again. I can’t let you leave.”

The battoussai punched him in the middle of the stomach. Drawing out all breath, Yahiko slumped to the floor. The battoussai knocked him out knowing Kaoru would be upset if he killed him.

Sano got up slowly. “Fucking Coward.” He called out.

At that the battoussai paused. He turned around slowly. No one had explained what this man or the rest of these people were to him. All he knew was they knew who he was. He held the hilt of his sword waiting for the man to attack. He didn’t have to wait long.

“Sano don’t be an idiot.” The women with red lips called out.

Sano swung out but his fist never connected with his target. The battoussai drew his blade into the most basic battou jutsu. He watched as Sano flew back.

His breathing was ragged an he was sure he had some broken ribs. Still he couldn’t just let Kenshin leave. Jouchan would be too distraught. “Asshole.” He called out. Getting to his feet was becoming more of a struggle. “Not gonna fucking let you leave.” Sano growled out. He used the Tou Ate (the Distant Hit). Unlike Anji he didn’t need to use a small sword or dagger. His fist alone hit the ground and sent the Futai no Kiwami to send the shock through the ground at Kenshin.

The battoussai saw everything in slow motion. The effect of such an attack could be fatal having never seen it before but the other man. This Sano. He was injured already and his lack of strength was obvious in the attack as it lacked the swiftness of the kill.

He drew his sword for the final time as Sano’s fist hit the ground. The battoussai took a high leap. “Ryu Tsui Sen.” He called out, knocking Sano to the ground creating a small crater where Sano had stood.

Sano laid on the ground. His breathing was erratic. The blackness was trying crush him. “Fucker” He gasped.

“You . . .

. . . .can’t just leave . . .” It was too hard to breath. “leave your woman.” It was impossible to stay awake.

The battoussai stood there, sword still drawn. Your woman. That’s what he’d said. Your woman.

“My woman.” He whispered out loud.

Small Note: His lack of remembrance is already an issue. He doesn’t like being left in the dark. He has lingering or more like surfacing feelings for Kaoru he doesn’t quite understand. Confused and angered he lashed out.

The battoussai used the Ryu Tsui Sen (Dragon Hammer Flash) - This is where the swordsman jumps really high and then slams down the opponent. This is probably Kenshin's favorite move since he uses most of the time.

Chapter Three

*************

Kaoru was slumped on the floor crying.  It had happened again.  He had left.  He'd left.  She felt like she was falling into something.  The feeling in her stomach, she felt sick. 

She had been slumped on the floor when Megumi had rushed in.  "Kaoru! Kaoru you need to get out there before he kills someone.” Megumi’s tone was frantic.

Kaoru understood the words and it took her a moment to process them but once she did she ran out. She forgot. She’d completely forgotten that he was a danger to everyone out specially himself.

She ran into the courtyard. The eerie silence was deafening. She spotted the battoussai right away his sword drawn, standing over Sano’s crumpled form. Somewhere behind her Megumi gasped.

Both women flew down the steps and into the yard. Kaoru threw herself over Sano. The tears coming back slowly.

Megumi touched his neck feeling for a pulse. Letting out a breath when she found one.

“Sano, can you hear me?” Kaoru asked as she leaned over Sano’s body. Her hands touched his chest just before she was pulled back.

“What do you think you’re doing?” His voice had a cutting edge to it.

“I . . .” She didn’t understand the question.

He grabbed her arm and pulled her behind forcefully.

“But Sano . . .” She began. He whirled around so fast she walked into him. Her nose and mouth brushing his cheek.

The cutting words he’d been about to say were lost while he looked at her. But just as fast as the feeling emerged it was hidden again. He turned around and dragged her back to the house. The walked past their tea, past the kitchen, past her room and finally his room. He tossed the door aside. He threw her into the room and she fell onto the futon which hadn’t been made.

“Kenshin?” She said startled by his actions.

“You lied to me.” He hissed with his back to her while closing the door.

Her eyes grew wider in confusion. First he said he didn’t believe she was his friend and now he accused her of lying. She shook her head in response. She watched him turn around and walk back to her but stop a couple of feet away with a thunderous look on his face.

“Kenshin I don’t understand?” She exclaimed.

“Who are you?” He repeated watching her face closely.

“I told you already. Kenshin we’re friends. I care for you a lot.” She finished.

Convincingly if he might add. Still he didn’t believe her. He kneeled in front of her and took her face into his hands. “You’re a liar.” He stated his breath wafting over her.

She blinked slowly, almost lazily. Her mouth opened with the same sluggishness, almost sensuously. “Kenshin,” and the way she said his name confirmed his thoughts. He eased his face down giving into the slightest touch of her lips. She didn’t resist and closed her eyes. His control clicked back into place and he pulled away. He broke all contact with her as he stood up to look down on her again. She opened her eyes slowly.

He’d given her a chaste kissed and lasted for less then a half a heartbeat but it had been enough to burn the blood in her veins. Licking her lips, to where they had touched she focused on his face. She tilted her face in confusion.

“It’s obvious to me we are more than friends. Why do you lie about it?” He asked her in a clipped tone.

Her face flushed at the insinuation and she looked down to the floor. Being accused by other people was different than being accused by him. “Kenshin. Things are complicated. It’s not so easy to define.” She spoke to him even though she looked at the floor.

That made him think for a bit. Maybe she was ashamed of what they had. She was twenty and unmarried. He’d been living with her . . . “Are you or are you not my woman?” He asked.

Her face turned a crimson red. “Kenshin where did you hear that?”

She evaded the question. “That doesn’t matter. You will tell me now what you are to me? Are you shamed of our relationship?” He asked fury taking over the clipped tones.

She shook her head. “Kenshin we don’t have . . . .”

“So you don’t love me?” He asked with an unforgivable anger.

“That’s not it, DAMN IT! You’re twisting things,” she cried out.

“If you don’t. Tell me so I can leave.” What point was there in staying if she didn’t want to carry on. He felt his mood darkening.

She rose to her feet faster than he thought she could. “I do. Kenshin I do.” She cried into his shoulder.

His arms came around her waist. Utterly confused by the situation. He let her cry. Her arms found their way around his neck as she cried. Everything was all wrong.

After sometime she remembered the others. She pushed him away and a scowl came to his face. “The others.”

She tried to push past him and instead he blocked her. “They don’t matter.” He said.

Her face formed into a frown. “What do you mean they don’t matter they’re our friends.” She said in an exasperated tone. When he didn’t move her hands went to her hips. “Move Kenshin.”

He looked at her curiously but still didn’t move. He felt the rise in her ki and to be honest it amused him. She stomped her foot and with great vehemence pushed him aside. But she couldn’t get him to budge. “Kenshin baka.” She said as she tried to move past him.

The way she spoke to him they were very familiar with each other. He let his eyes trail over the curves on her form. She was more than pretty, now that he really looked at her. And it didn’t have anything to do with the fact that he now knew they were on an intimate level.

Kaoru felt like her ears were going to burn off and fall, the way he was looking at her. “Kenshin.” The call of his name brought him back. “They’re my friends and they’re very important to me.” She pleaded with him hoping he understood at least that. Since he didn’t seem to care about them himself. After a moment he nodded and opened the door himself. He caught her hand as she ran past him. Together they walked down the hall back out to the yard. They didn’t get that far though. Yahiko sat nursing his stomach and Kaoru broke away from Kenshin to Yahiko.

“What happened? Oh Yahiko what happened?” She said a bit frantic, checking him over for more injuries.

Yahiko glared at the man behind her. Kaoru’s face was tinted pink from all the crying and her voice was hoarse too. “Why don’t you ask the battoussai.” He said with venom.

Kaoru turned her eyes to him. He stood straight and with no trace of emotion on his face. “He wouldn’t.” She began. “Kenshin would never.”

Yahiko laughed and it was a cynical laugh. Something she would have never pegged him for. “Kenshin as the rurouni, never. But that man over there is not Kenshin.”

The words cut through straight to her heart. It was true in a sense. “Are you alright though?” She asked brushing back some of his hair like he was a small child.

“I will be when he leaves.” Yahiko muttered.

“Yahiko please don’t.” she pleaded with him. She’d had such an emotionally draining day. She couldn’t take much more.

“If I leave you can rest assure she will leave with me.” Came the icy reply. The battoussai left the room with out another word.

Kaoru gave a deep sigh and helped Yahiko up. Together they walked outside to the court yard where Sano was already sitting up.

“Ouch, Fox! Watch what ya’r doing.” Came Sano’s voice.

“If you stayed still, Baka.” She said sticking the needle into his skin making him cry out in pain again.

“Shit, when Kenshin is Kenshin again he’s really gonna get it.” He muttered.

“You mean the way you showed him today.” Piped in Yahiko who was being supported by Kaoru.

“At least I stood up to more than one punch.” Sano said in return.

Yahiko glared at Sano. “But I’m not the one boasting I can kick his ass. Chicken head.”

Sano grounded out his teeth.

Megumi gave an exasperated sigh and knocked Sano on the side of the head.

“Damn it!” Sano bit his lip to keep himself from calling her anything else. “Are you almost done?”

“Baka,” she said pulling on the bandages that covered his ribs. “There.” she said rising to her feet.

Kaoru looked down on him guiltily. She let go of Yahiko to embrace Sano. “I’m so sorry,” she said. He winced on contact but let her cry. “I’m so sorry.”

“It’s alright Jouchan.” He said smiling at her. “I’m still here.” His face turned to the side then. The battoussai stood in the doorway watching. His amber eyes glittered perilously. Sano’s eyes narrowed in anger. So he hadn’t left after all. He pushed her back a bit to look at her eyes. He felt bad for her. Out of everybody here she’d had it worse. These small scars, courtesy of Bastard Battoussai would heal but the emotional stuff Kaoru was subjected too. He was surprised she wasn’t insane yet. “You look tired,” Sano said wiping a tear away. “You need some rest.”

That was all it took. The battoussai stood next to her in the next instant. He grabbed her by the arm and pulled her up closer to his body.

Sano looked at him in anger. “She’s not a doll.” He began but was caught off. As the battoussai leaned down.

“This will be the only time I warn you. Next time you touch the hands come off.” The battoussai’s low whisper was more threatening than any opponent with a gun or sword could be.

Sano’s eyes opened wide in disbelief. “You gotta be kidding me?” He muttered.

Kaoru pulled on the battoussai’s arm. “Kenshin.” She cried in embarrassment.

“Ken-san.” Megumi said at the same in disbelief.

He pulled back with Kaoru at his side again. “I am Himura to you.” He said addressing everyone in the yard. He was sick and tired of them addressing him as anything else.

“Kenshin?” Kaoru began not sure she could call him anything else.

“It’s alright for you,” he said with a ghost of a smile. It was different from the rurouni smile. This one, it looked odd considering the color of his eyes. “Because you’re my . . .”

She covered his mouth before he said it in front of other people. Still they all watched as her face turned beat red.

They narrowed their eyes at them. “She’s your what?” Sano questioned. The battoussai threw him a withering look and said nothing else to him.

*************

“Kenshin I need for you to be nicer to them.” Kaoru pleaded once they were back in the dojo. He looked at her for a moment the feeling of uneasiness was gone. He’d only felt that way when he’d been away from her. Which confused him. The whole situation confused him and that pissed him off. Kaoru shook her head in annoyance he wasn’t even listening to her. He was such a . . .

“Do you sleep in my bed?” He asked her with out any warning. Her face burned a shade darker than his hair. Unable to form words she shook her head furiously.

He watched her body language and it was hard to tell if she was lying or not. She’d lied before about their relationship. For what reason he didn’t know but the fact remained she could just as easily be lying about this now. I mean three years with out touching. That just seemed impossible. His thoughts formed patterns while his face and body remained still. His eyes however remained watchful over her.

Eventually feeling too tired to play this game with him she spoke to him. “Kenshin I need some rest.” She raised her head just the slightest. “I’m going to take a nap before dinner.” She started to walk away and was almost to her door before she noticed he’d followed her. “Kenshin.” She warned. Just because he was sick didn’t mean he could take advantage of the situation. Well maybe not sick, stupid wish. Still the fact remained he should have known better.

He walked past her and into her room. He’d asked if she slept in his but he’d never asked if he’d slept in hers. Kaoru stomped into the room in a fury. “Himura Kenshin.” She snapped. “You get out of here right now. Hentai. I need to rest.” She was ready to pummel him. Rurouni or not. Instead her eyes widened when he laid back on her futon. Her hands fisted together. ‘This guy,’ she thought. ‘Was making some pretty big assumptions here.’ “Kenshin.” She said trying to keep her temper in check. The whole day had gone to hell. She really didn’t need this. Her nerves where on edge.

“Did you not ask me, not to leave you.” His question hung between them. How did she explain things to him when she wasn’t sure about the answer. How could she when the rurouni had never given a direct response.

“Kenshin,” she said before rubbing her temples. She felt his hands ease her to the futon. Maybe she could just ignore him and he’d go away. Yes that’s what she’d do. Her eyes felt heavy anyways. With one last yawn she laid her head down. She was too tired to notice the firmness of her pillow.

The battoussai looked at the small women. She was confusing indeed. She was older yet younger than he. He was of course older in age but his mind. Damn it to hell. Fifteen! What kind of sh . . He took a deep breath trying to calm down. That was another thing. He’d always been quick tempered but now. Though it had only been one day, things were different. It was almost like something was wrong. The problem was it was hard to say whether it was because of his memory loss or because of something else. His mood changed while looking at her. He’d never been draw to a women before. Not as a man. He’d never been with anyone. His hand trailed down her cheek to her neck were he could feel her pulse. As an hitokiri he barely got any sleep and any sleep he did get he got while sleeping in a sitting position. Looking at her made him want to sleep, like a normal person. Maybe he could pretend for a while. He pulled her further into him until she faced him, her head still resting on his shoulder. She looked soft and he knew she was as he touched her face and arms. His arms eventually wrapped around the back of her waist. It was a bold move but as his woman she was probably used to more. He hid his face in her neck and hair and slowly drifted into something akin to sleep.

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He was running through the streets. Chasing someone. He couldn’t tell who it was only that they were eluding him. He ran faster but it didn’t seem to make a difference. Why couldn’t he catch up? He paused in the middle of the street, closing his eyes and stretching his senses. He could feel no one. He opened his eyes again and he could see the shadow, lingering up ahead. Just standing there waiting for him to take chase again.

He took chase and so did the shadow. “Oi!” He yelled.

The shadow made no move of acknowledgement but somehow he knew the shadow heard. “Oi.” He yelled again.

How can anyone not stop when they hear you calling them?

“Stop!” He yelled and this time the shadow’s step faltered as it ran ahead. He was becoming angry. “Stop!” He yelled for the last time. His deep tone carried the anger he felt. He gripped his katana and blurred for a moment. His speed had increased to an unbelievable point. He pulled out his sword and not being able to see in the dense fog, he swung out blindly. He heard a thump. The fog had gotten thicker. He reached down and felt a shoulder.

“Oi!” His voice had lost all edge. All feeling. He wanted answers and he wanted them now.

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Kenshin woke up with a start. He’d actually fallen asleep. He glanced around the poorly lit room. It looked like night was setting in. Time for work . . . . except tonight there would be no work.

“Kenshin,” she cried, almost yelled.

He shook her a bit and she woke up. She was aware of his face hovering over hers as she looked up at the ceiling. Such a weird dream. She felt his hands moving and quickly her eyes turned to his face.

Deep purple eyes revealed not so much as a thought as they gazed down into her blue orbs. She blinked slowly in confusion. He’d been asleep. Here. In her room. She grounded her teeth and he simply blinked at her.

“Hentai. Playing innocent with me won’t work.” She spoke in a curt tone.

“Then tell me what will.” He responded in kind. Her mouth opened not sure what to say. It made him wonder. He was curious to see what it would be like to really kiss her. Would they kiss like they normally did or would she slow down and teach him how.

The look he was giving her started to slowly melt her bones. “Kenshin,” She breathed. “We need to get out there and have dinner.” Despite her words she made no attempt to get up. He lowered his face down to her and her eyes closed.

“Kenshin no.” She said just before their lips touched. She pushed up at him. Trying to make him move. It upset him. It more than upset him it pissed him off. She didn’t want him. Any warmth in his eyes perished in that second and broke away from her completely. He didn’t understand, it was too many . . . . . there were too many feelings.

Kaoru noticed the instant he became cold. “Kenshin, I . . .“ She was speaking to his back since he wouldn’t turn around. “I just want you to be you when you kiss me.”

He turned around immediately at that. “What does that mean? Act my age? Control my temper? Quit feeling possessive?” Tell me what that means.” He barked at her.

She stepped back at his tone. She’d always been afraid of the battoussai. He being here meant Kenshin was gone. “Kenshin you don’t understand.” she began.

He grunted. How many times did his teacher say that. Baka-deshi you are to young to understand. Too young. He shook his head clearing his mind of the memory. His eyes glittered with anger. She brought about feelings he’d never experienced before. But worst of it all was she wouldn’t explain. He turned his face away and walked out. The others would be there most likely. Grounding his teeth and setting his jaw he walked out to find the others talking amongst themselves. He took his seat, which is where Kaoru had sat him both times earlier in the day. Kaoru came out a bit after that. She gave them a watery smile as she sat on Kenshin’s left.

They all knew she’d been crying probably since he’d woken up. So they acted as if nothing was wrong. Meanwhile the battoussai kept his eyes focused on some point on the far wall.

“Are you feeling better Sano?” Kaoru asked noting he looked much better than when she’d gone of to nap.

The battoussai’s eyes turned to Sano, with something close to hate in his eyes. Sano frowned at the look and redirected his gaze at Kaoru. Kenshin was looking at her menacingly.

The whole room had gone quiet after Kenshin had come in. They had all seen the way he’d been looking at Kaoru. Though only Sano had seen the hate in his eyes for him. Kenshin finished eating first. He placed his bowl down and left. Kaoru followed suit after him. The rest of them exchanged looks before sneaking after them.

“Kenshin wait.” She called out to him.

“I’m not leaving the property.” He said as he continued to walk.

“Kenshin.” She called after him as she began to cross the yard.

“What am I not allowed anywhere with out your direct permission.” He said as he stopped in the doorway of the practice hall.

She stopped a couple of feet away from him. “Kenshin,” She didn’t understand why he acted the way he did.

“I think perhaps I should leave until my memory comes back. I’m sure I can find people I know.” He said stepping the rest of the way in.

The others crept along the side of the dojo, straining to hear. If they moved any further though he’d sense them. They saw Kaoru walk in after him.

“So you want to leave.” Her voice choked on her emotions.

He turned around and she stopped. He noticed she didn’t approach him and only when he seemed to make her mad did she address him with familiarity.

“Why do you insist in keeping me here when you don’t want me here?” He watched her eyes widen at his observation.

“Kenshin no matter what. I need . . . I would like . . . for you to stay.” She was afraid of revealing too much. She was afraid of the battoussai and it’s true she didn’t want him here but it was still Kenshin and she couldn’t let him leave. He was dangerous like this. She swallowed her fear and approached him. Her trembling form stood in front of him. She stretched her hand much like she did on that road over two years ago when she welcomed him home.

He looked at her hand like some foreign object. He didn’t take it. Slowly her hand dropped and her eyes teared up.

“Why is Sano always here?” He asked her.

“Because he’s our friend and he helps out around the house sometimes.” she spoke quietly.

He wouldn’t be able to remain here. It was too quiet. He should give it a chance though since this was his home after all. Still being surrounded by strangers. One’s he didn’t like. “I can’t stay here.” He said turning to meet her tearful eyes.

Tbc…

Small Note: All right some things I need to clear up for some of you. Kenshin is still 31, it’s only his state of mind that’s receded to the age of 15. That said. Kenshin’s not used to feeling this confused and being left in the dark makes him feel like he’s still a pupil. Someone who doesn’t know better. The confusion lays in that he has conflicting emotions, some which he has no idea where they came from.

In the OVA the battoussai appeared to be in a dark mood most of the time. Reserved as he may have been he didn’t appear friendly.

Now I stated that she pieced together that he was more himself at the age of fifteen that at any other point in his life. While he may have not been deliriously happy. He was content to do what he was doing because he was protecting those who could not themselves. I really hope this clears things up for you guys.

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Please remember anything between these lines means dream sequence. In this chapter it was Kenshin who had the same dream.

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Thanks again to all those who’ve already reviewed.

Please continue to read and don’t forget to review