Chapter 10

The next day Christian was dreading getting out of bed. How Rebecca got him to go to a dinner- a FAMILY dinner was beyond him. He got the feeling she was taking advantage of his position. He couldn't turn her down, not when it was his duty to escort her. He was technically a bodyguard, not a rent-a-date. Still, he told her he would go and so he would. After a quick shower and a change of clothes, He was about to head out the door when Chad came strolling in, whistling. He stopped when he saw Christian, standing there with a disapproving look on his face. "Um...Hey dude." Chad greeted. Christian shook his head. "You know you could lose your position for what you did." He reminded his friend. Chad grinned. "Only if I get caught. And before you ask, yes it was DEFINATELY worth it." Chris paced, aggravated. "You slept with your client Chad. Did you even consider the consequences before you jumped in bed with her?!" Chad looked down at his shuffling feet. "Can't say that I did.... Would you believe I was seduced?" Chris just gave him an aggravated look. "Guess not." Chad answered himself. He put his hands out to ward off any more anger being thrown in his direction. "Look Chris, I know, it's against policy and I know that to some it may be horribly wrong. But I know what I’m doing and so does she." Chris had to concede that. He wasn't his boss and it was Chad's own choice. Still, he'd hate to see his one friend tossed out before he had a chance to get home. Having Chad around made life a little more bearable for him. Chad chided him to come to lunch with he and Regan. It was a silent walk most of the way. Chad didn't feel guilty for what he did. He really liked Sarah and he hoped they could continue to see each other. "You wouldn't think this was wrong if you knew how I felt." He commented to Chris. That grabbed the attention of the dark haired boy. "And…. You feel?" Chris pressed. Chad sighed and put his hands behind his head as they continued walking. "I feel like I’ve known her my entire life. She's so great, nothing like her dad. She goes to college in Hawaii. She's gonna be an author." He grinned. "Beautiful, smart, surfs. She's perfect." Chris snorted. "You sound like a love sick puppy." Chad looked at him curiously. "Really? Hmmmm. I guess I could be." Chris felt a moment of alarm, like he unleashed some random thought in his friend he couldn't erase. "Could be...what?" He asked, hesitant. Chad looked at Chris. He could answer. But Chris wouldn't understand, not until he felt something close to it. "Nothin man, let's just get some grub ok?" Chris conceded and they met Regan as usual and ate. After his training exercises, Chris had some time to kill. He headed over to the computer facility. After showing his identification he took a seat in the corner and logged in. He made sure no one was looking and began his secret skill- hacking. His mother trained him well and he practically grew up with a computer. He had 15 minutes before his presence would even be noticed, but only if he kept the screens moving fast. Any delays would cause suspicion. He cracked his knuckles. "Ok Mr. Maxwell, where are you hiding?" He scrolled countless files. He read about his reported missions in the past, his old address where he and Hilde lived, file after file. Nothing on his current whereabouts...."You can't just disappear..." Chris muttered. His eyes narrowed in on one particular address. No other information present. It was so hidden he was surprised he found it. "Hmmm. worth a shot. He scrawled down the location and cut the program with 3 minutes to spare. He went online and typed in the address. St Matthews Church... "He lives in a church?" Chris muttered. He checked the clock. "Shit I gotta go." He grabbed his jacket and headed out to the Yuy's for what he deemed, a dinner with the devil.

            Relena watched as her daughter greeted her escort at the door. He looked so much like Heero when he was angry, but as she watched him smile, she saw so much of Hilde in him. He had her smile.... She stepped away from the wall where she was spying and walked to greet him, plastering a warm smile on her face. "Christian, we're delighted to have you this evening. We'll be leaving shortly." He too, plastered a 'sincere' smile on his face. "Whenever you're ready Mrs. Yuy." She nodded and went to call the driver. Heero came downstairs. The two men had a staring contest, one wanting to speak, and the other daring him to. Heero sighed and continued out the door. Not this evening. Relena had important matters to settle.

Christian thought the drive would never end. He sat, looking out the window. He replied when he was spoken too, with up most politeness, but inside he was chewing his tongue. He could immediately tell Rebecca's mom didn't like his presence. Hell he didn't like his presence either. He kept asking himself why was he here. *Bad judgment* his mind told him. The restaurant was elegant. Uncomfortably so. It was acceptable to wear his Preventer’s uniform inside, but he felt extremely underdressed. Except next to Heero. No one would dare argue his clothes though. Heero wore whatever he felt like and no one would chastise him for it. He chose a blue shirt, buttoned up but untucked. Relena had nagged him into a gray pair of slacks instead of the jeans he tried to sport. That was as dressy as he was getting. With his rugged good looks, he could wear anything. Christian ate in silence and scarcely paid attention to the business conversation going on with Relena and her consorts. He would feel Rebecca nudge him with her foot and he was hard pressed not to smile. She could tell how bored he was. She kept conversation with her father and would try to draw him in, but Chris was adamant. He was an escort and bodyguard. He shouldn't even be eating at the same table. Rebecca insisted and Heero agreed, not wanting Chris to be alienated. So here he sat, with the devil, his charming daughter, his wife and her advocates. Where was a miracle when he needed it? As if to answer after the initial dinner, Rebecca excused herself. "I'm tired and I want to go home." Heero nodded, and looked to Christian. "Relena still has business to contend with. Can you manage to take her?" Christian nodded. "Sir." He answered. Heero bit his tongue so he wouldn't say something. He wanted to talk to him, just for a while. But Christian was stuck in his cadet role and it was better than being ignored. He nodded and bent down to kiss his daughter's cheek. "Be good. We'll be home shortly." He gave Christian the warning look a father is equipped with once their daughter comes of age. He let them go after that. The car would take them and come back to wait for the Yuy's. Christian opened the door for her, sliding in after her. Rebecca giggled and scooted closer. "You were quiet at dinner." He shrugged. "Not much to say." She sighed. Getting him to open up was like pulling teeth. The car dropped them off. He turned to head back to base but she grabbed his arm, stopping him. "Stay.... Just for a while." He shook his head. "I need to get back." He said, but it was just an excuse and they both knew it. The truth was, the way she looked and smiled, the way the moonlight would make her platinum hair shine like moonspun silk.....It was all too intoxicating for him. If he didn't leave, he was afraid of what might happen. Rebecca let go slowly. "I could order you to stay until my parents came home...But I won't. If you’re going to stay, I want you to do it because you want to stay and be with me. I don't want to force you. Will you stay?" Suddenly he felt as if his legs were glued to the spot. He couldn't leave even if he wanted to. She smiled at his silent answer and grabbed his hand, leading him into the garden. She sat down on one of the many benches overlooking certain areas of the garden. He was slow to follow her lead. *What are you doing?* His mind kept asking. *Start a conversation.... anything. Just say something* "So...." He couldn't think of anything to say. "Are you ready for the ball?" She started, feeling the tension radiating off the both of them. She just wanted him to open up. But there was something else there...He wanted to say something...or do something. She blushed at the thoughts running through her head. "Rebecca..." He started. He wanted to say something about the ball. It wasn't what came out. "Heero's my dad..." Rebecca stared in shock. "What???" She asked. He leaned his head back. "That day you saw us arguing.... He...He's my biological father. He just found out when I arrived on base. I just thought I should tell you...You have a right to know what's going on, whether or not your parents want you to." Rebecca took a moment to digest this. This was her father’s REAL son. She could see the resemblance so clearly now. Still, It complicated things...Did that mean they were siblings? Could she be attracted to her brother? Was he even considered her brother? "Where's your mother?" She asked quickly, needing to know the rest to come up with a conclusion. Christian grimaced. He had told Heero that his mother was dead. Was he willing to lie to Rebecca too? "She's...She's at home. Away from here." He saw Rebecca's shoulders sag with relief. So, no. There was absolutely NO relation. She just met him, no brotherly feelings attached. She mentally smacked herself. She was making excuses...Excuses to be with him. But it was still wrong. He was her escort. He...*He's not interested.* she sighed. It wouldn't be right. At least that's what she told herself. Still she couldn't bear to give up. Something inside her refused to let her. She shyly looked up at him...He swallowed hard. *Why was she looking at me like that?*

"I want you to kiss me." She blurted out. Chris started coughing in surprise. "What?!" He asked shocked. Before she could repeat herself he put his hand up to stop her. "No. I know what you said. Are you crazy or something?" She looked away, embarrassed. *Well that didn't go well* "I'm sorry." Was all she could muster up. Chris stood. "I think I need to leave. Goodnight Miss Yuy." She frowned. "Back to formalities again?" She stood with him. He shook his head. "Getting comfortable with you was a mistake. I won’t let feelings get in the way of my duties." She ran in front of him to stop his retreat. "So you DO feel something for me!" She said, hope swelling in her. She needed the confirmation. She needed to know he cared, even just a little. Christian realized his slip too late. "Goodnight." He tried to walk around her but she wouldn't let him. "One kiss. Just one and I’ll let you go." She said quickly. He could tell she'd be there all night arguing. Maybe one...Just so he could get out of there faster. She took his hesitation and stepped up closer, looking up at him. "Just close your eyes." She whispered as she wrapped her arms around his shoulders, pulling herself up on her tip toes to reach him. He was lost...Why was he doing this again? He did as she said and let his guard down as he closed his eyes and felt her warm lips on his. He stopped thinking. He stopped resisting. She felt his arms wrap themselves around her and deepened their kiss. She was exhilarated. Her first kiss. And with the man she wanted more than she could fathom. She sighed into him, getting to know the feel of him against her. He felt her sigh and felt her hands run down his arms to his chest. The quickening of his heartbeat snapped him back into reality. He pushed away from her quickly. They both stared at each other in the garden moonlight breathing heavily, one happily content, the other letting guilt tear him apart. His duty. His pride. He felt them both slip out of his reach.  "What the hell am I doing?" He asked out loud. Rebecca was slightly worried. He looked upset when she didn't think he should be. "Christian?" She asked as she took a step closer. He stepped back quickly. "No. I got to go. God what the hell was I thinking?!" He turned to leave quickly without a goodbye, without another look. Rebecca watched him go, disappointed. She knew he was the one for her. She knew it the moment she saw him. Why was he being so resistant? Her hand reached up to softly touch her lips. He kissed her like his life depended on it. He may have started it just to get away from her, but it certainly ended differently. She smiled softly. She was getting to him. She'd break down his defenses soon enough she was sure of it. She'd make him realize he cared for her.

Chapter 11

Christian cursed himself with every known word in his existence. How could he be so stupid?? He kicked a rock out of his path and quickened his pace, eager to just get to his bunker and hide under his blankets and never come out. He felt crazy. He was good at self-control. He always had been, except tonight. That girl. That damn beautiful intoxicating girl... What was he going to do? "You'll be gone soon.... Just hang in there." He coached himself. He finally reached his bunker. Once inside, he realized he'd be alone tonight - again. Chad was playing a dangerous game...Christian got ready for bed and climbed to the top bunk, crawling into his much desired blankets to shield him from the world. *You can do this. Focus...* His mind kept wandering back to the kiss. The most perfect kiss he could ever imagine. Had he not pulled himself together, what would have happened? His mind started to wander with the possibilities until he snapped back to attention. * FOCUS!* his mind screamed. He couldn't. Already he missed her company, the way she laughed, the way she could make him drop his guard so easily. It wouldn't be a big deal if he didn't have to see her on a daily basis. Maybe he should talk to Une... He frowned. The problem wasn't the assignment. The problem was he WANTED to be around her. Whether he had his assignment or not. Could he stay away from her now? He was beginning to understand what was driving Chad...Unfortunately. He fell asleep contemplating his circumstances.... And thinking of Rebecca.
"Rise and shine Cupcake!" Chad chimed as he shook Christian. Chris mumbled and curled up under his blanket. "No." He growled. Chad shook his head. Such a tough guy Chris was. Except when he had to wake up. Then he was just a whiny grouch. "Hey, we have morning training today. You HAVE to get up." Chris reluctantly sat up and ran a hand through his messy black hair. "How is it you never sleep and your still full of energy?" Chris asked as he jumped down and headed for the shower. "High on life?" Chad offered. Chris just ignored the comment and took a quick shower and got dressed. Together he and Chad sprinted to warm ups barely making it. As Chris went through his drills his mind was on tonight’s ball. How was he going to pull off being Rebecca's escort and technically her date? Part of him said to just enjoy himself and go, the other trying to find excuses to ditch out. But he knew it was too late for Rebecca to go with someone else...He couldn't do that to her. Warm ups were over before he knew it and he had the rest of the day to himself. He took full advantage, going out for a walk. He ended up at the spot where Rebecca had taken him when they first met. He leaned back into the long grass and stared at the landscape spreading out before him. What was he going to do? He wasn't use to being so closed off. If he thought something he usually said it. He was reminding himself too much of Heero and it was rubbing him raw. *Coming here was the biggest mistake of my life*. He was so engrossed in his thoughts he didn't hear the footsteps approach. "Christian?" Rebecca asked. He looked up and held his breath. “What are you doing here?” he snapped. “I always come here to get away from the house.” She knelt beside him and he stiffened, afraid of what she was going to do. She noticed. "Please don't be uncomfortable around me." She pleaded. He just looked away. *Too late* his mind said. She sat next to him and continued. "I'm not sorry for last night. I wish you hadn't stopped..." He looked back at her. "Stop it." He warned. She didn't "I can't help it. I don't know what it is but you...You just make me feel different. I want to know you better. I want you to get to know me. I want you to see past who you think I am."  He could say he felt the same way but he wouldn't. He had to stop this before it got any harder. He sat up. "Your the daughter of the man I hate more than anything in the world!" His defenses were coming up and he couldn't stop his sharp tongue. "You’re the reason my mother had to abandon her life here and live in hardship raising her son alone. You've made me miserable and you continue to do so. Just leave me alone." She knew he was just saying that to make her leave. Still, her eyes welled up with tears. He said it to be purposefully hurtful, but he had to feel some of the things he said were true. He once again regretted saying those things as she fought back her tears. "I'm not leaving." She said defensively before the tears broke through and spilled down her cheeks. "I didn't mean to - " He started but stopped. Yes he did, he did mean to hurt her with his words...But he didn't know what came over him. Instinctively he pulled her close and comforted her, whispering words of apology and comfort into her ear and wiping her tears away. He couldn't understand it, but her hurt was hurting him too. She looked up at him with her bright violet eyes and he lost all his resolve. He bent his head and slowly kissed her, cautiously, scared she'd pull away from him. She didn't. She pulled him down to the grass with her and wrapped her arms around his neck. His mind screamed for him to get a hold of himself, but he knew he was fighting a losing battle. He gave in. He let her run her hands under his shirt, letting her get to know him by touch alone. He, regretfully, snapped back to reality and pulled away, trying to ignore the disappointment on her face...he stood and pulled her up with him, dusting off the pieces of grass still clinging to her dress. "This isn't right." He stated simply and stared off into the distance in thought. Rebecca sighed. He surprised her by grabbing her hand. "I'll walk you home, ok?" She smiled softly and nodded. She didn't have to rush things. He'd come around on his own...
Heero watched from the kitchen window as Christian came into the yard with his daughter. His eyes narrowed as he took in the sight of them holding hands, how his daughter reached up to peck his cheek before saying one last thing to him. Christian watched her go into the house and turned to leave. Heero watched his daughter practically skip to her room, giggling to herself. What was going on?
Rebecca held another dress up to her in the mirror. She wanted to look great...Sexy. Something to catch him off guard. She sighed. Not one sexy dress. For once she'd like a slinky black dress, or tattered jeans. She was tired of being a little doll. She walked over to the window. She had missed out on so much living. And to find out it was all to cover up her parent’s mistake...HER. She grabbed another dress. "You'll have to do." She chimed to herself in the mirror. Not Sexy, Not black. But it was one of her favorites. She answered the knock to her door and smiled when her dad came in… until she noticed his expression. "What is it daddy?" She asked concerned. Heero was too stressed out to ease into the subject. "Was it a mistake to let Christian be your escort?" Rebecca took a seat on her bed and looked up at him. "No. Why?" Heero frowned. "What is going on with you two?" Rebecca started to panic. "Nothing." She stated quickly. Too quickly. "You're going to start lying to me now?!" Heero snapped. Rebecca tried not to fidget under his glare. Her dad was extremely upset, but she didn't know why. "I saw you walk home with him. You don’t kiss your escort...Unless he's something more. I don’t want you to see him again." She flew off her bed. "But dad-" Heero put his hand up. "NO. Since you've already planned for the ball, tonight is the last night. I will speak to Une tomorrow to change his assignment." Rebecca clenched her fists to her sides. "You can't! It's not fair!" Heero shook his head and looked at his daughter. "You don't know him. He's a punk kid. He doesn't respect authority he - " "He's YOUR son, daddy." Rebecca cut in. Heero scowled. "You know?" She sighed. "Yes I know. I found out a little while back. He's your son and I’m..." She lowered her voice to a whisper. "I'm not your real daughter." She raised her voice again. "Why...WHY didn't you tell me any of this?!" Heero made his way to her bed and sat on the edge, rubbing his eyes tiredly. "You've already been lied to so much; I can't bear to try to tell you another. I didn't tell you because...By the time I had found out myself, you were already old enough to recognize me as your father, Your ONLY father. I kept the secret because I thought you'd be happier with that than the truth. But there have been times when I wanted to tell you...but how do you bring up something like that? 'Oh hey honey by the way I’m not your REAL dad, just thought you should know?' I couldn't do that." He shook his head. *That was probably the most he’s ever said in one conversation.* She thought to herself. Rebecca wanted to be angry with him but just couldn't bring herself to be. "What are you going to do about Christian?" She asked, anxious for his answer. His scowl was warning enough the answer would not be good. "I told him to leave you out of this and yet he's playing with your head. We're going to settle this...Soon." He left the room after that, leaving Rebecca with a sick feeling in her stomach. She finished getting ready with a somber air in the room.
Christian waited at the bottom of the stairs in the Yuy Manor. He wanted out, and fast. Heero was shooting daggers at him, which he had no problem returning. But he didn't want Rebecca to see the animosity between them. As if on cue she came down the stairs. Christian couldn't help but grin at her. She wore a long rose-colored gown, small sequence in the fabric making it shimmer with every step. She pinned most of her platinum hair up with small diamond pins. She looked every part the princess that Chad teased her for. Heero pulled her aside gently to remind her that tonight was the last night she could see him and she nodded although she had no intention of complying. Christian was unaware of it all. He escorted her to the ball, sporting his Preventer’s uniform. He didn't have any other proper clothes with him. Rebecca found the outfit rather sexy and most the soldiers and cadets were wearing theirs as well. Rebecca beamed as she walked with him, holding his hand. "Ummm. I'm thirsty. Do you want something?" He offered. She nodded and they headed for the refreshment tables. Christian was whirled around by another set of hands. It was Regan. "Hey stud, looking good!" she said jokingly...At least that's what she made it sound like. She took some time to look Rebecca over and gave her a dirty look before flashing a bright smile at Christian. "You may already have a date, but the first dance is mine, come on!" Before either Christian or Rebecca could utter a word, Regan had dragged Chris to the dance floor, leaving Rebecca fuming. Regan was decked out in a slinky long black dress, one Rebecca couldn’t help but envy. She let her wavy red hair down, giving her a wildly sexy look. Rebecca was experiencing jealousy for the first time in her life and she didn't like it. She fumed even more that Regan could get Christian to laugh, where she had a hard time just getting him to talk..."Good evening your highness." She turned around and rolled her eyes at Chad bowing at her. "Oh not now." She sighed and turned to leave. His hand snaked out and grabbed her wrist. "Oh no you don't, we're dancing." She tried to free herself but she ended up on the dance floor anyway being too much of a lady to make a scene. Chad pulled her close to whisper in her ear. "Careful princess, you have jealousy written all over your face." She blushed. He continued. "The question is, are you going to just stand here and dance with me, or are you going to rescue your date?" She pulled back to look at him. "Are you suggesting I go break up their dance?" She asked suspiciously. This was his beloved cousin they were talking about. He grinned at her. "If I thought Regan was the one Christian wanted to be with I’d be the first one to support her. Unfortunately that's not the case, and it’s something she'll have to deal with. YOU on the other hand..." He gave her his trademark wink. Could she be blushing anymore? She nodded and went to do as Chad suggested.... But how? She got closer and heard Regan giggling. Rebecca noticed how Christian was relaxed...He wasn't wearing his 'I have no emotion' face. Maybe she was overreacting. He wasn't hers. She had no claim on him.... And yet she couldn't stop her hand from snaking out and nudging his shoulder. He turned around and raised an eyebrow curiously. "Did you want to dance?" He asked her. She felt her heart flutter, even though he made it sound like he was asking if she felt like dancing period instead of wanting to dance with him specifically... She nodded, gritted her teeth and tried to ignore the look Regan tossed her as she sauntered off the dance floor. Christian looked down at the tense girl in his arms and frowned. “What’s wrong with you?” He asked her. She couldn’t take it anymore. “Everything, obviously.” He raised his eyebrows in surprise at the bitterness in her tone. She let go of him and stared at the floor, trying to control her emotions. Everything was building up in her. First her parents lying, then Christian coming into her life, her feelings for him that he didn’t return, and Regan’s attitude. He always had smiles for Regan and as soon as he looked in her direction it turned into a frown. Christian hated her. Regan hated her. And for the life her she had no idea what she did to deserve any of it. She needed to leave. “This is all a mistake.” She muttered and walked off the dance floor. *What the hell?* He thought. He shook his head and followed her. It didn’t take long for him to catch up. “What the hell is the matter with you?” He asked, irritated. She wanted to come to the ball. She dragged him here and then she leaves him on the dance floor when he didn’t want to be there to begin with. Was there no pleasing her? Rebecca wiped her tears quickly and faced him. He was surprised to see the sadness in her amethyst eyes. “Nothing, Christian, I just need to be alone right now.” He nodded. “Ok I’ll take you home.” She shook her head. “I can make it on my own.” He followed her anyway. “It’s my duty –” She whirled around. “That’s all I am to you, aren’t I? Just your fuckin job. You can take your job and shove it up your ass! I’m not a child, I can take care of myself!” She stormed off, leaving him in shock. He shook it off and followed behind her, far enough so she wouldn’t notice. He couldn’t help but grin. Yelling and swearing, standing up for herself. She had some spirit after all. Perhaps she wasn’t the weak little girl everyone assumed she was. He made sure she got home safely before retiring to his bunker. He had a long day ahead of him tomorrow. He was going to meet the man he had waited a lifetime to find.

Chapter 12

Christian walked up to the small church and held his breath. This was the place. He couldn't bring himself to open the door. What would he say? No answer came. "Just open the door." He told himself. After agonizing over it he finally pushed the heavy wooden door open and went inside. The church was dimly lit and very empty. He walked down the aisle and scanned the room. How was he supposed to find someone he had only seen in pictures? 18 years had passed…. Could he still look the same? He saw a man sitting in the first row, leaning against the inside of the pew. The man looked up? "Can I help you with anything?" He asked cheerfully as he looked up, but the smile he intended for the stranger faded away when he looked at the young man standing there. "Mr. Maxwell?" Christian asked. He had rehearsed so many lines over the years, playing different scenarios in his head, but all that left him as he stared into a living photograph. Had the man not aged?! Duo stood up. He had never seen this boy before but he looked so familiar and he knew exactly whom he was reminded of. "Are you Hilde's son?" He asked cautiously. Christian breathed out a "yes." He was surprised to see Duo's eyes filled with tears. "Hilde…. God how is she?" Christian began to relax. So he did remember his mother. This wouldn't be as difficult as he first thought. "I- She's..." He stammered. Duo noticed and shook his head. "Where are my manners? I'm sorry." He motioned for the boy to sit in one of the pews, coming to sit next to him. "What's your name, kid?" Duo asked a patient smile on his lips. He'd get the answers he wanted. The poor kid looked like he was about to choke. "Christian. Christian Schbeiker." He answered quickly. Duo smiled. "Well I assume since you came looking for me you already know who I am." Chris breathed a sigh of relief. So far, Duo was exactly what he had expected. Easy going, relaxed. He had so many questions…and he was sure Duo had questions for him too. "My mother is good. She talks of you often." Duo couldn't help the giddy grin that spread across his face. "Still? I was afraid she had forgotten me." Chris shook his head. "No. I feel like I've known you my whole life she's talked about you so much." Duo shook his head sadly. "If she still talks about me, then why did she leave? Without a word she packed up and left me behind and never contacted me. You must know the reasons." Christian shifted uncomfortably in his seat. How would Duo take the news? "It's a long story." He added, uneasy. Duo leaned against the back of the pew and made himself comfortable. "I'm all ears."

Rebecca climbed over the hill to where Christian had taken off to. She had stopped by the base to apologize about her actions the other night, but he had left early this morning. She had seen him head off in this direction and she had followed, not wanting to wait to make amends. She stared oddly at the church. She had a strange feeling she shouldn't go inside, but shook it off. It was a church for goodness sakes. What could hurt her in here? She crept up the small grassy hill and stood at the door. What if Christian was doing a confession? He'd be angry with her if she barged in on his private moment. She decided to peek in the window just to be sure…

"Umm. Mr. Maxwell..." "Duo." Duo cut in. Christian nodded. "Before I answer that…. Why didn't you ever look for her? What went wrong with your lives?" Duo's face fell. "The biggest mistake of my life. I was young and stupid." Christian scowled at the cop out answer. "You've got to do better than that." He insisted. Duo took a deep breath. "Where do I begin…?"

 

(18 years earlier)

Duo sat on the couch, aggravated. He and Hilde had another fight over something stupid. It felt that sometimes she would purposely pick fights with him these days. More and more he spent time away from the house just to avoid getting yelled at. He hung around with Heero and Relena more often. With Heero gone most of the time, Relena and he spent more and more time alone. Duo was getting lonely. Frustrated. The only time he felt he enjoyed himself was when he and Relena would go out. It was on one of those days that he started down a road he had no intention of going. They went out, Heero and Hilde both had to work and the two them thought that a movie would be nice. Back at Relena's, they watched a couple movies when it was as if something took control of him. The way she laughed, the way she'd flip her hair over her shoulders and smile at him. It was all so intoxicating that he leaned over and kissed her suddenly. They both sprang apart, shocked at what happened. "Why did you kiss me?" She asked, stunned. He just kept staring at her, "I don't know." He answered honestly. The loneliness was getting to them both and they attacked each other again giving in to "just one night" to get it out of their systems. They stayed away from each other for a week after that, the guilt and confusion making it difficult. Duo could barely look Hilde in the eye. He started to avoid her. Where else was there to turn? Heero? Could he take comfort on his friend after what he did? No. He couldn't. So he went back to Relena, who welcomed him with open arms. Weeks passed. Then months. Duo wondered if the charade would ever stop. Although he and Hilde still lived together, he rarely saw her. She was gone as much as he was, with no mention of where she had been. He was curious, but reluctant to ask. If he brought it up, he may have to confess what HE had been doing, which would spell disaster for him, for as distant as he was being to her, Hilde was still the love of his life. There would come a day when Relena would approach him with words that would shake everything up. "I'm pregnant." She stated. Duo's face fell. Hilde would have to know the truth and he would have to own up to his mistakes. But then the plot twisted. "Even though I've been with you…I've still been with Heero too. It's his baby."  Duo sagged with relief.  It wasn't his. He wanted to jump with joy. The scare made him realize he had to come clean, if not for himself, then for Hilde. "Don't tell Heero about us, promise?" Relena pressed. Duo agreed. He would not tell Heero, but he had to make things right again with his Hilde. He stayed away for a few hours, until after the sun had set, trying to find the words to explain what had happened and worse off, why? He finally found the courage and proceeded home; ready to do whatever it took to get on the right track again. He opened the front door of his darkened house. "Hilde?" He called out. He searched the house and there was no trace of her. He went into their room and froze. She was gone. Her bags, her clothes, most of her belongings were gone. Duo sat on the bed, dejected. Had she found out? If only he confessed earlier, maybe he could have stopped her from leaving…

 

Christian seethed in anger. "You cheated on my mother?!" He hissed out. Duo nodded, "I can't lie about it anymore. I searched for her, for years I looked in every possible place I could. You're mother's good at disappearing when she wants to. She didn't want to be found." Christian pondered that for a good moment. No, his mother never knew what went on with Duo and Relena. She had hidden herself away because of another reason….himself. How could he fault Duo for the same mistakes his own mother made? "So, is that why she left? Did she know?" Christian looked away. He never thought he'd have to explain this story himself. Was it even his place to? He straightened up. "This won't be easy to hear." Christian warned. Duo nodded and prepared to hear something he knew deep down he really didn't want to know.

 

(18 years earlier)

Hilde watched Duo slam the door and pull out of the driveway. She swiped at the tear that threatened to fall. Stress was getting the best of her and she knew it. It seemed that Duo didn't lift a finger to help her around here anymore. Being a preventer, running the garage and doing the cooking and cleaning for 2 was weighing down on her. If he'd just help a little, just a little effort on his part could make such a huge difference. As weeks passed she saw less and less of Duo. Heero and Relena were absent as well. The solitude was getting to her and she threw herself into work, taking up assignments for the Preventer’s. It was on one of those assignments that she was paired up with Heero Yuy, a night that would change her life forever. They stayed in the hotel room they were sharing. Budgets were low and the force couldn't get them separate rooms. Hilde went through the files next to the bed. Heero was pacing the room, pondering the mission from earlier, something he did when he didn't have anything else to think about. Hilde saw and smiled. "Hey let's go get a drink." Heero snorted. "I don't drink." She set down her files and stood up. "Then come watch me drink. I need to unwind." Heero relented, having no other plans. So they ended up at the small lounge in the hotel. Hilde was sipping her long island ice tea and people watching. Heero eyed her glass. "What is it?" She handed it to him for a sip. "It's a long island ice tea." She answered. He took a sip and nodded. "It's good I think I'll have one." She giggled and went to order one for him. 1 turned into 4 and they were pretty drunk after a while. Heero pointed his finger at her. "There was something in that ice tea." He accused. She laughed. "You didn't know what was in it?" He didn't and he was quite drunk because of it. They stumbled back to their room, laughing at each other’s drunken state. "I'm gonna take a shower." He told her and stumbled to the bathroom. Hilde got ready for bed in the mean time. Once Heero was out, Hilde stole the bathroom to brush her teeth. Once she came out she saw Heero taking a pillow and blanket to the floor. "We can share the bed, it's cool." She offered. She had seen the size of the roaches in this place. Heero had too and didn't argue about it as they both crawled on the big mattress. Both were still a bit tipsy and kept laughing for no reason, Hilde even resorted to shadow puppets on the wall just to keep it going. She sighed as she wiped away the tears from laughing so hard. "I haven't laughed in so long." She said aloud. “Me either." he replied Heero propped himself up and stared at her. She felt his eyes on her. "What?" She asked. He blushed. "Duo's really lucky to have you." He commented. "Thanks. But he doesn't seem to think so." Heero brushed the stray hairs from her face. "Then he's a fool." He said before planting a kiss on her. Hilde knew she should have pulled away. So did Heero, but they couldn't. Both were so alone all the time. They gave into each other and let passion take hold. The next morning it was awkward and they decided to not see each other again. But with Duo and Relena spending more time together, Heero and Hilde had no choice but to see each other and each time it got more and more hard to stay away. Hilde found out she was pregnant 2 months later. She had barely spoken to Duo in the last few months. She knew who the father was. She went to tell him, but he found her first. Before she could tell him the news he had told her that Relena was pregnant and that they couldn't see each other anymore. Hilde felt her heart sink. She nodded and said it was best. "I'm sorry but I have to take care of her." He said as he hugged her goodbye. Hilde forced her tears back and nodded. "I understand. Take care of yourself." Heero watched as she walked away. When she got home, Duo was still out. Hilde walked into the bathroom and slammed the door, sliding to the floor, and burst into tears. She was utterly alone. Duo would hate her if he knew and Heero had his own family to take care of. What would she do? On a whim she stormed through her room and packed everything she could. She would leave this place behind. No one had to know what happened and she could raise her child in peace somewhere else. She picked up a picture frame with Duo and her sitting on the beach on vacation and stuffed it in her bag. She left the Sanc kingdom with a few credits and as much of her life as she could stuff into 2 bags.

Duo was on the verge of tears. "She left cause she got pregnant. If only I'd have gotten there sooner, I could have talked to her. We could have worked something out." Christian shook his head. "How could she have known that? I've always wondered if she regretted leaving the way she did, but she'd never tell me." Duo looked up at him. "So your Heero's son. I'd say you look more like Hilde." Christian chuckled. "Yeah tell that to him. My mother sent me here to get to know good ol' Yuy, but wouldn't you know I just can't bring myself to tolerate the man." Duo shook his head. He should get to know Heero, but he could see the flicker of bitter anger in Christian's eyes at the mere mention of him. Better to let him be for now. Christian had so many emotions chasing each other. His mother. Finally meeting Duo face to face. What they both had done in their youth... Christian looked up. "Wait a minute… If I'm Heero's son and YOU were the one that slept with Relena…Then that…that means."

"He's my father." Rebecca finished as she stepped in from the doorway.

Chapter 13

Rebecca stood in the doorway of the church, staring at the two men who were looking back at her. “Rebecca….What are you doing here?” Christian asked as he stood up. Rebecca blushed and walked into the small room. “I followed you.” She hurried as she saw him scowl at her. “I just wanted to apologize for my behavior last night before I lost the nerve to. I didn’t know where you were going to.” She stopped and looked at the man who was standing next to Christian. “If what you say is true, then it all makes sense. You’re my real dad, aren’t you?” Duo swallowed the lump in his throat. “Yes.” was his short reply. Christian turned to him. “You don’t seem too surprised by that.” Duo cleared his throat. “That’s because I already knew.” Christian looked back at Rebecca, who was trying her best to hide her tears beneath the surface. “You knew…everyone knew…except for me.” She mumbled, her voice trembling. Christian walked over to her and gently lifted her face to look at him. “I’ve been looking for this guy for years. But you have a lot more questions that need answering. Go talk to him.” Her eyes widened with anxiety at the thought. What on earth could she say? Christian gave her a slight nudge forward. “Go on. I’ll wait for you outside.” He turned back to look at Duo, giving him a nod that they could continue later and walked out of the church, leaving an anxious daughter and a reluctant father alone in the church. “Rebecca-” “You know my name?!” She asked incredulous. She didn’t know what to do. This was so unexpected. She had seen his picture for countless years in her living room. Her father’s war buddy. She looked into his eyes, eyes the same shade as hers and frowned. How could she have not put it together? She cursed herself for how blind she had been. Duo came to stand next to her. When he offered for her to sit, she shook her head. Her emotions were too charged to sit quietly. “Why didn’t you look for me? How could you let someone else raise me as their own and NEVER come to see me?!” She asked, her voice rising with each word. Duo leaned against the pew in front of her. “By the time I knew you were mine…..” He sighed. He had wondered if he would ever have this conversation. Part of him hoped he never would have to. “I didn’t know at first.” He continued. “I assume you’ve figured out what happened before.” She waved her hand impatiently. “Yes I know that part.” He looked up at her, curious. “When did you find out?”  “When Christian first arrived here. He and my dad were arguing and I happened to walk in at the wrong moment…” She paused, “Sort of like today.” Duo stared at the young woman in front of him. She had his eyes, but that’s where the similarity ended. In truth she didn’t look much like her mother either. She had Zech’s hair, long and platinum, so blonde it was almost white. She looked so delicate that if you were to touch her, she’d shatter. How did such a frail creature come from Heero and Relena’s parenthood, two of the strongest willed, tough skinned people he’d ever known? “I knew your mother was pregnant. She thought it was Heero’s. I left them alone, I felt too awkward to stick around. Too much had changed in our circle of friends. More than I knew at the time. It was about the time when you were three years old. Your eyes, they changed from baby blue to the vibrant color they are now. Heero noticed first. Relena had to come clean about the whole affair. She later came and found me and told me the news, but asked me to stay away. See, you already acknowledged Heero as your father. You didn’t even know who I was. I didn’t want to break up a happy home, regardless if I was your real father. So I stayed away.” Rebecca closed her eyes tightly to stop her tears. She had cried enough for these people. “You didn’t even care enough to be there. Regardless of breaking up a home or not, you never even tried to know me.” Duo stood and grabbed her shoulders. “I’ve been there. Your first grade play, when you played the snowman. You’re shot at the soccer team. There have been countless times when I showed up. You just never knew who I was. But I was there…” Rebecca couldn’t help herself. She latched on to Duo and held him tightly. “Why couldn’t you have taken me away from my life?” She cried brokenly. “I’ve never experienced anything because of my parents. I’ve been kept in the dark about everything. Why couldn’t you have just taken me away from all this?” Duo wrapped his arms around her and laid his chin on top of her head. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have listened. I know that now.” She pulled away. “Listen to who?” Duo looked down ashamed. “Your mother.” Rebecca’s eyes darkened as she wiped her tears. “My mother. She told you to stay away…She…. I have to go.” She whirled around and started to walk off, but swung back around “What should I call you now?” She asked sadly. Duo let out a small smile. “Let’s just start with Duo, ok?” She smiled at him and nodded. “Goodbye Duo.” before running out of the church. Christian jumped out in front of her. “Whoa, what happened?” He asked, concerned. Rebecca let him detain her. “My mother is a conniving bitch!” She growled. It was a side of her Christian was not used to seeing. “What are you doing now?” He asked hesitantly. He was sure it wasn’t good, whatever it was. Rebecca continued walking, Christian by her side. “I don’t know yet.” She admitted. She wanted to run away. She wanted to hide. She wanted to sock her mother, right in the nose. A real good punch; watch her stunned face…. She giggled to herself at the thought, prompting a questioning look from Christian as they headed back into town. Christian walked her to her home. “Thank you Christian. I’m sorry I interrupted your meeting with Duo.” He shrugged it off. “I’ll be sure to talk to him again.” She turned and walked into her house. Christian went around to lean against the side of the house; having a feeling Rebecca was going to need him.

Rebecca was fuming. Her mother had interfered with her life for the last time. She stalked through the house, each step building her courage and her anger until she was shaking with it. She found her mother in the den going through paper work, as usual. Rebecca didn’t think, she lost it. She picked up the nearest object, a small round vase and hurled it at her mother, sending the porcelain bullet shattering into the wall just beside Relena’s head. She looked up and scowled. “What the hell are you doing?” She hissed at her daughter. “I missed.” She spat out. Relena flew up from her chair and Rebecca took that moment to walk towards her. “How dare you.” Relena scolded. Rebecca clenched her fists to keep her hands from shaking. “How dare YOU mother!” She screamed. “You are the most manipulative bitch in the world! You kept my real father away from me against his will, against MY will. I can’t believe you!” Relena shook her head calmly; a trait Rebecca could have strangled her for at this moment. “Calm down, Rebecca.” She scolded gently, as if Rebecca were a mere three year old with a tantrum. “Calm down?! In the past couple months I’ve found out that the man I’m in love with is my father’s son! And that he’s not my brother because Heero’s not my father! And then I find out my real father was his best friend and that YOU told him to stay away from me?!” She tried to catch her breath, but there was so much she needed to say that she couldn’t stop. “You knew! You knew all along and yet you acted like everything was fine. Did you think I wouldn’t find out?” Relena had truly believed she could keep her daughter in the dark, but now that it was out in the open, she was angry. “How did you find out?” She asked. Rebecca couldn’t believe her mother was standing there acting as if she had done nothing out of the ordinary. No apology was forthcoming, she could see that now. “Find out what, that my mother was a WHORE!?” The stinging slap burned her cheek and cut off any elation she would have felt from that statement. She gave her mother a death glare, one Heero Yuy would have to admire. Relena got in her face. “How dare you disrespect me after all I tried to do was protect you from the truth?” Rebecca snorted. “More like you wanted to save yourself from it. You’re the most selfish, self-centered, manipulative-” This time she caught Relena by the wrist before her hand could connect with her face again. “I’m not done.” She growled. “-snake the world has ever known. And to think you represent peace! I’m ashamed to be your daughter. I’m ashamed to be in your presence even now.” She finished off and roughly threw down Relena’s wrist. “I’m leaving. I never want to see you again!” She hollered and whipped around to leave. Relena stood in the middle of the room holding her wrist to her chest. What had happened? How did her perfect family just fall apart around her? She glanced out the window and frowned. Christian Schbeiker. None of this would have happened if he never came here. He turned to look at her, as if he could feel her eyes on him Relena fumed as he smirked at her, a smirk that reminded her too much of his mother. Both of them were nothing but trouble. She turned from the window and sat at her desk. She’d make sure to rebuild her family. And he would have no part of it, Heero’s son or not.

Chapter 14

Christian waited for Rebecca to come out, as he knew she would. Unfortunately for him, Heero Yuy stepped out first. He immediately spotted the dark haired youth leaning against his house and stalked over to him. “Stay away from my daughter.” He growled. Christian snorted.  “Well that’s pretty difficult seeing as I’m her escort.” He replied sarcastically. Heero was in no mood. He had heard the argument with his wife and daughter and was none too pleased about the way things were turning. He grabbed Christian by the front of his shirt and slammed him against the wall. “I’m not fucking around kid.” Heero growled. Prussian blue matched Prussian blue as they stared at each other, angry eyes mirroring the other. Christian forcefully shoved him away. “Look Yuy, I’ve done what you’ve asked. I haven’t dragged your name through the mud, I’ve done my duty, and I haven’t used Rebecca in ANY way.” Heero’s eyes darkened at the way Christian emphasized “ANY”. “Get off my case.” Heero pushed Christian again, too angry to control himself. “As of this moment you’re relieved of any duties you were assigned under me. I thought having you around would have made some progress for us to get to know each other, but now I see it was all for nothing.  Trying to build a relationship with you has ruined my daughter’s life. Son or not, I curse the day you came here.” Heero spat. Christian was fuming and he didn’t know why. Something in him snapped. He lunged at Heero, knocking him down on the ground. “Fuck you!” He hollered, sitting on top of Heero’s chest, the front of his shirt in his hands as he slammed Heero over and over on the ground. He was hurt, angry. “You ruined my mother’s life! And because of that you almost ruined mine! I hate you! I hate you so much I wish you died before I ever had to come here and see for myself what a bastard you are! The only reason I’m glad I came here is that I met Rebecca and I had the opportunity to watch her realize what a bastard you are!” Mention of his daughter put Heero into a rage. He slammed a fist into Christian’s face, sending the younger man to the ground. Heero stood up, daring Christian to do the same. “Stay away from my daughter.” Heero warned again as he turned and walked into the house. Rebecca watched from the window as her father punched Christian. She ran downstairs but was stopped by Heero before she could reach the door. “No.” He said and grabbed her shoulders. “Dad let me go!” She wailed as she tried to reach the door. Heero shook her once and forced her to look into his eyes. “Rebecca, stay away from him. He’s only going to hurt you.” Rebecca shook herself loose. That’s what you and mom keep saying, that he’s going to use me. He’s going to hurt me. Let me tell you something. I’ve thrown myself at him more than once and he never took advantage of me, no matter how much I wanted him too. The only people that have hurt me are you and mom!” Heero stood in front of her, but let his arms drop to his side. Rebecca looked up at him with sad eyes. “Duo, dad? How could you not tell me? Even if mom convinced you not to, how could you keep that from me? You should have known better.” Heero closed his eyes, ashamed. Yes he should have known. But it was too late for regrets now. “I’m leaving. I don’t need my stuff; I don’t need anything, except to get away from here.” Heero scowled. “And where will you go with no money? Or anyone to take care of you?” She scowled back. “How about taking care of myself? I’m willing to give it a shot.” Heero wanted to stop her, lock her in her room, do anything to make her stay, but the truth was he knew how unhappy she would be. He was tired of seeing his daughter unhappy, especially because of his mistakes. He pulled her into his arms, surprising her. “You do what you need to. I’ll be here if you need me.” Rebecca hugged him back tightly. “Thank you daddy.” She whispered before running out the door. Christian was still waiting, holding his jaw where Heero had socked him. Rebecca ran up to him. “Are you ok?” She asked concerned. He grunted. “He sure packs a punch.” Rebecca grabbed his hand and pulled him away from the house. “I’m leaving home. Can I stay with you at the base for a while, till I come up with a plan?” Christian nodded. Chad was rarely there anyway and even if he was, he was sure Chad wouldn’t mind. “I’m sorry.” Christian stated after walking silently beside each other for a while. “For what?” He looked away. “I never meant to cause problems for you.” She shrugged. “You never even knew I existed. I know you didn’t mean for these things to happen. Besides…It’s the first time I’ve ever done anything for me. I’ve never spoken up for myself, I’ve never experienced anything. If anything, you shouldn’t apologize, I should be thanking you!” She replied exuberantly. Christian just shook his head and said no more. Once back at the base, Christian tried to get Regan to come and join them for dinner, but Regan took one look at Rebecca and declined. Rebecca could feel the dislike rolling off of the fiery haired soldier. Christian took Rebecca back to the bunker. They talked for hours and played cards, anything to kill time before bed. Rebecca climbed into Chad’s empty bunk, wishing for once that Christian would invite her up. He was too much the gentleman to try anything no matter how much she wanted him to. She was confused. She knew he had feelings for her, even if he kept them bottled up. Would he ever show her how he felt? She fell asleep with her romantic daydreams filling her head. Christian felt small hands glide up his chest. He opened his eyes slowly. “Rebecca?” He whispered. “Take me Christian.” She whispered back. She was in her pajamas….Wait a minute, she wasn’t wearing a red teddy when she went to bed was she? His head hit his pillow again as she used her perfect little mouth to drive him crazy. Red teddy….this can’t be happening…Christian opened his eyes. It was early the next morning. *Fucking dream* He grumbled in his head. He knew it was too good to be real.

Christian couldn’t sleep any longer and so he grabbed the small TV Chad had brought with him on his bed and turned the volume low so he wouldn’t wake his guest. What he saw made his blood turn cold. His home was in turmoil, the government and the rebel forces battling in the streets. Only one thought came to mind. Where was his mother? He grabbed the phone and dialed home. *Pick up…. Mom pick up.* He kept urging in his head. He caught a glimpse of raven hair running through the crowds on the TV. There was his mother, in the midst of all the fighting. She looked injured and tired, but the damned stubborn woman never knew when to retreat. He had to get her out of there. He jumped to the ground and threw on some clothes. “Christian?” Rebecca asked tiredly. Her eyes widened as she took in the panicked look on his face. “I have to leave.” She sat up. “What? Where are you going?” “My mother’s in trouble. I have to go.” He started to walk out the door. “Wait! I’ll come with you!” She said as she hopped out of bed. “No!” He snapped. He took a deep breath to calm down. “It’s not safe. I’ll come back for you after I make sure she’s ok. Stay here. I mean it Rebecca.” He warned. Unexpectedly he pulled her in and gave her a hard kiss before heading out the door. She stood there stunned, bringing her fingers to her lips, still moist from the kiss. *He kissed me. He kissed me!* Her face broke out into a giddy grin. At that moment Chad waltzed into the room and stopped short as he saw her. “Princess? What are you doing here?” He asked startled. Rebecca grabbed his arm and led him to a chair. “Where is Christian’s mother?” Chad shrugged. “Ummm I don’t know.” She scowled at him. “You’re a horrible liar. She’s in trouble. Where is she?” Chad began to sweat under the interrogation and then frowned. The Princess was interrogating him? What was going on here? “What’s going on?” He asked instead. Rebecca climbed up and grabbed the TV off Christian’s bed. “Christian’s mother is in trouble. He left this morning to help her…But he’s going to need help. Where is she?” She demanded as she shoved the small TV against his chest. Ow, take it easy princess.” He took a glance at the screen and set the TV back on his dresser. “Honestly, I can only guess. Christian seemed pretty certain he wanted to keep his home on the down low.” Rebecca grabbed her clothes and went to take a quick shower. When she came out of the bathroom, Chad was standing by his bed, eyeing his blankets still crumpled from her night there. “You didn’t have sex on my bed did you?” He asked bluntly. She blushed. “No!” He had the nerve to chuckle. “Just checkin.” He said as he sat down. “Are you going to help him?” Rebecca asked. Chad shrugged. “What makes you think he wants our help, princess?” She gritted her teeth every time the word ‘princess’ left his fowl little mouth. She whipped her hair back into a ponytail and grabbed her coat. “If you won’t help then I’ll find someone who will.” She scoffed and exited the room. Chad sat there, debating to ignore her and go to sleep which h